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Open Poetry #27
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brian sites
Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475
usa

0 posted 2003-07-02 04:05 AM



sssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...........

I
   hear
        your
   heartbeat

                          like
two

notes

                on a piano

over
       and
             over

like

time.....

                  I fall
             into
                 it
and

      wrap
sleep
       around

my

own

                  dreaming
               of
               waves

© Copyright 2003 brian sites - All Rights Reserved
Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
1 posted 2003-07-02 05:00 AM


a very nice write - great display of words!
Roniece Dawson-Bruce

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2003-07-02 06:51 AM



What a warm feeling
                           left behind
in words' display
                               of a heartbeat.

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
3 posted 2003-07-02 07:02 AM


I liked the tender thoughts and the way your art of words was displayed!
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

4 posted 2003-07-02 08:34 AM


You look so SERENE when you're sleeping...



and? You just made me wanna go back to bed.

(but I guess that's not news, huh?)



Beautiful, bri...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2003-07-02 08:38 AM


Oh this is so beautiful!
And I love the presentation.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~If you haven't heard the sunset,
   you haven't been listening.~

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
6 posted 2003-07-02 12:47 PM


Brian~
There is such a soft beauty to this write~
Shhhhhhh .... ~

I really feel the conveyance of thought through those piano keys~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
   noles1@totcon.com   

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
7 posted 2003-07-02 12:53 PM


Brian I loved this and
I liked the way the
        words
             fell
                  down
and
   wrapped
around
      the
       p
         a
           g
         e
       s

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
8 posted 2003-07-02 12:56 PM


*chuckling* and you know why.

This is rather different than "chin on chest", eh?

*chuckling again*
Sorry! just thought of all those gurglings and whinings that our insides make.

Ah geez

yv
Senior Member
since 2003-05-30
Posts 574

9 posted 2003-07-02 01:10 PM


Very beautiful.  Short yet full of love and a very interesting writing style all together.  I enjoyed it very much.
Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

10 posted 2003-07-02 01:30 PM


Made me miss someone, hell...anyone.  
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
11 posted 2003-07-03 06:19 AM


lovely Bri . . .
ssshhh . . . keep listening
xxoo

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

12 posted 2003-07-03 07:23 AM


ahhhh, could feel the love beating gently...lovely write.
gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
13 posted 2003-07-06 04:05 PM


ooooh goosebumps.
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
14 posted 2003-07-06 04:13 PM


brian....a sweet time!
freespirit
Junior Member
since 2003-07-03
Posts 24
USA
15 posted 2003-07-06 04:25 PM


I fell right into this poem like the words did on the page.
Wind
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

16 posted 2003-07-06 04:58 PM


wow... breathing...

I said I'm going to buy a gun and start a war,
If you can tell me something worth fighting for
-coldplay

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