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Open Poetry #27
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ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state

0 posted 2003-07-01 11:55 PM


hardly a maverick plan towards success
or a direct fall into a bottomless abyss
but on the fence and in between
wonder where in life we've been

an aim at over the the maize's hedge
oh such poor lives dimmed and dredged,
out of the womb from where we'd bloom
into a well...we could permanently dwell
Oh, moment of silent release
or forever hold my peace
from that dismal walk on parapet's edge
that percipitous fall from nature's ledge
a sight which drew storeowners gaze
a sight familiar yet I'd still be amazed
a young man, old enough not to be so carefree
dispersed cardboard boxes...a window to his melee
with carton strips shuffled on an asphalt surface
what could have been the young man's purpose?

chosen to witness one doomed to a quicker end
can we measure existence, how does life contend?
I watch in disbelief..a spectators stance
along cobblestones the carton carpet advances...

"What could be the cause", I blurt out
a breach of contract, a broken spout..
with contents to be so rudely spilt
I stand with feelings of mixed awe and guilt....

But there is sometimes method in one's madness
signs of lost fortune, I'd witness parental sadness
I'd witness clothed fragilty, except for the boy's bare feet
carton strips provided a focus for observer eyes to meet

whatever will be, destiny's child is free
they say the future is still hard to see;
here might be just plain folly or spent madness
a fortune is lost...I felt grave sadness...





[This message has been edited by ecrivan (07-02-2003 12:03 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Martin Dansky - All Rights Reserved
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
1 posted 2003-07-02 01:04 AM


Gosh Martin! This is tremedous!
QjQ
Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756
U.S.A.
2 posted 2003-07-02 01:09 AM


whatever will be, destiny's child is free
they say the future is still hard to see

very nice lines..
nicely written,,

thanks for your hint on the wording change on my post "dreams"

A voice of honesty
   is treasured
more than voices
   of flattery
      QjQ


ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
3 posted 2003-07-02 01:38 AM


Thank you Passing for your appreciation,
your welcome QjQ..glad you liked it


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