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Open Poetry #27
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Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455


0 posted 2003-07-02 02:23 PM



To watch love come to her mind,
catching some phrase,
some picture
of forgotten, as she read
as I pretended to…
watching her
over top of book and coffee
with feigned understanding
of what drove her to entangle
the day to day duplicity
with the fairy tale idea
that we all have a perfect love
and that dreams do come true.

© Copyright 2003 Duncan - All Rights Reserved
jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

1 posted 2003-07-02 02:27 PM


oh I love this, it so decribes women...at their unreasonable best...ain't no arguing with them on this point....
sigh...unless you reach the point where the dream dies, and reality leers at your dream dying......long deep sigh...
would rather dream than watch one die
...anyway...nuff of my rambling.....love this !

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2003-07-02 02:34 PM



...and you can't take that away
from me!...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
3 posted 2003-07-02 02:39 PM


...damn

Love this!
Make room on that porch will ya?!!

~If you haven't heard the sunset,
   you haven't been listening.~

QjQ
Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756
U.S.A.
4 posted 2003-07-02 03:33 PM


Excellent,,,,,

A voice of honesty
   is treasured
more than voices
   of flattery
      QjQ


SEA
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Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
5 posted 2003-07-02 04:13 PM


we do
........they do


("that we all have a perfect love
and that dreams do come true.")

[This message has been edited by SEA (07-02-2003 04:14 PM).]

Nightshade
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Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
6 posted 2003-07-02 04:18 PM


Wonderful ! A keeper for sure. Chris

"Said you'd give me light...
...but you never told me about the fire."

~Stevie Nicks~  
      

    

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

7 posted 2003-07-02 04:38 PM


Thanks folks!  This one is truly more Ron's than mine and since he's not around to argue today, thought I'd take the opportunity to give him credit (or blame ).
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2003-07-02 07:24 PM


FORGET CREDIT....
I wanna know who did the edits  lmao


Well Well...aint you just the dueting fool today

Very cool vignette of succinctity at its best...but I sure wanted this one to go on and on.....

hmmm.. me thinks you slackers use succinct to get out of writing   LOL

All I can feel is this distance between you and me.
I can say I love you but I can't make you believe me
because touching is believing.

c.j.

Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
9 posted 2003-07-02 08:00 PM


OK, Duncan...it is true, I, too, have that fairy tale notion of love.  

Enjoyed your work...both of you!

Patricia

By the way, where is this porch?  I think I might have to crash the party!

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
10 posted 2003-07-02 08:06 PM


And as you watch, you realize that in fact the fairy tale already has come true....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
11 posted 2003-07-02 08:17 PM


that we all have a perfect love
and that dreams do come true


Yep, isn't that true?

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
12 posted 2003-07-03 02:49 AM


wonderful duet from the porch
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
13 posted 2003-07-03 12:11 PM


To watch love come to her mind,
catching some phrase,
some picture
of forgotten,

But not ever really forgotten... allowing that belief. *S*

Beautiful work, guys... *S*

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