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Open Poetry #27
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Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

0 posted 2003-06-26 01:42 PM


{From the Notebook}



                     There are seeds within the tide
voices within  rain they linger    --    waiting patience
that I could open my chambered      heart;
weave this earth   together
with you--     edging horizons
always,   just out of reach

     Would he see?    I wonder if he noticed
     the glass  caught in sunlight;
I never offered coffee,    always hoping
early mornings   were dreams   held in open
arms,
water colors      in deep green
somewhere reflecting blue

                     I must have missed the
passage of river and air,
beyond sight and fingertips
like--          softly falling        snow
on     December nights

                     but what does it remind me of?
hard-wood floors and lost thoughts-
New York alleys  and Cafes,
       London and Meadow park                  every

    space between     breaths

there is no sleep tonight
       only the moon in open windows

I look up and understand

Through the darkness
I can see your light
And you will always shine
And I can feel your heart in mine

I will remember you

© Copyright 2003 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved
passing shadows
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since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
1 posted 2003-06-26 01:44 PM


gorgeous write!
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2003-06-26 01:53 PM


there was space between the breaths I took in reading this to hold a dozen universes.... or at least fill that many with thought and admiration for the talent.

you always amaze me... always leave me with that feeling of being clumsey in my own attempts... not in a bad way at all... just makes me aware of the differences and the difference between a house painter and a portrait artist.. both paint.. but on very different levels..


Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
3 posted 2003-06-26 02:09 PM


Greeneyes - what more can I say about your words. As always...

BC

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
4 posted 2003-06-26 02:39 PM


Penned as always with such elegant style and grace..
I am forever in awe of your written words.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~If you haven't heard the sunset,
   you haven't been listening.~

papabear
Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 102
Atlanta, GA
5 posted 2003-06-26 03:46 PM


much enjoyed....
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
6 posted 2003-06-26 03:51 PM


I was trying to pick out my favorite part -- but I would have to just repaste the whole darn thing!  

(exhale)


Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
7 posted 2003-06-26 04:15 PM


Lauren

You always write like silk in a soft breeze...exquisite!

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
8 posted 2003-06-26 05:05 PM


So very rich in vision and deep thoughts. Thoroughly enjoyed. TD
Mistletoe Angel
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Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
9 posted 2003-06-26 05:08 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Oh Lauren, yes, there is far so much more than what we perceive and we just have to believe we are there in each heartbeat! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, I love this, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Lauren, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story

***Shakira***

Greeneyes
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In Your Poetic Mind
10 posted 2003-06-26 08:17 PM


passing shadows~

Thank you for your constant support, I appreciate you!

~~

Cpat Hair~

  your replies are always so honoring, thank you  for always taking time to read.....( can I email ya later?)



~~

Bill Charles~

    I love how you say it, thank you

~~
Enchantress~

you know, you are so lovely.....I always appreciate your tender and thoughtful replies....
hugsssssss


~~

papabear~

thank you much appreciated!


~~

Local Rebel~

(sigh) thank you for your touching reply.....hugsssss


~~


Martie~

I adore how you always see my words, thank you for reminding me how a breeze can feel......hugssssssss

~~


ThisDiamond~

thank you for letting me know.....I much enjoyed your reply......

~~


Mistletoe Angel~

luya hon....have missed being around for you vibrant and wonderful replies....you always leave me smiling.....


~~~~~

HUGSSSS

Greeneyes~

Through the darkness
I can see your light
And you will always shine
And I can feel your heart in mine

I will remember you

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

11 posted 2003-06-26 08:50 PM



                     There are seeds within the tide
voices within  rain they linger    --    waiting patience
that I could open my chambered      heart;
weave this earth   together
with you--     edging horizons
always,   just out of reach

     Would he see?    I wonder if he noticed
     the glass  caught in sunlight;
I never offered coffee,    always hoping
early mornings   were dreams   held in open
arms,
water colors      in deep green
somewhere reflecting blue

                     I must have missed the
passage of river and air,
beyond sight and fingertips
like--          softly falling        snow
on     December nights
============================
  every

    space between     breaths

there is no sleep tonight
       only the moon in open windows

I look up and understand

=================================


Your last line is poetic justice as thats just exactly what I think when I read your exceptional poetry...she DOES understand.
Its apparent you see into the light and have vision beyond the clouds...for your poetry is written from a place where few ever touch.
This is stunning my butterfly sister.
Some day I want to run barefoot in your beautiful mind.

All I can feel is this distance between you and me.
I can say I love you but I can't make you believe me
because touching is believing.

c.j.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
12 posted 2003-06-26 08:56 PM


Always look forward to your writes though the breaths between each post seems excruciatingly long..thanks for the post
Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
13 posted 2003-06-26 10:50 PM



"there is no sleep tonight
       only the moon in open windows

I look up and understand"

....and so do I. This is utterly beautiful, and caught the state of mind with such exquisite clarity and understanding....think I'll stop talking and just go back to read it all again.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
14 posted 2003-06-26 11:16 PM


Well? It all seems to have been said. I can only echo the thoughts above.

Another bijou.

Ed

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

15 posted 2003-06-27 10:25 AM


came back to read this again....
to breathe... to inhale its beauty...to exhale in its serenity.

what I wouldnt give to read every single exquisite word in that notebook

All I can feel is this distance between you and me.
I can say I love you but I can't make you believe me
because touching is believing.

c.j.

ctowen
Member Elite
since 2001-10-18
Posts 2286
Green Mountains of VT
16 posted 2003-06-27 11:24 AM


... taking in ...
      
        ... holding ...

                ... not ready to exhale ...


                        

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

17 posted 2003-06-27 11:30 AM


Would he see?    I wonder if he noticed
     the glass  caught in sunlight;
I never offered coffee,    always hoping
early mornings   were dreams   held in open
arms,
water colors      in deep green
somewhere reflecting blue

                     I must have missed the
passage of river and air,
beyond sight and fingertips
like--          softly falling        snow
on     December nights

                     but what does it remind me of?
hard-wood floors and lost thoughts-
God..I love these lines..and the hardwood floors and lost thoughts... (chuckling) took me to place of long ago...and wondering if I would ever see... I didn't then... but remember the tender of trying.



Ceinwyn
Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175
VA
18 posted 2003-06-27 11:33 AM


*sighs* yea what they said

If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried.

garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
19 posted 2003-06-27 05:19 PM


Lauren, I read this yesterday, but honestly was in such awe at your beautiful talent and way of writing poetry, that I was speechless. I had no idea what to say. I still don't. I feel like Janet Marie...i'd like to see what you have in that notebook, too. Post more of them for us to read. Okay, Lady?
Thank you in advance.  
(It's good to see you back, too)  

Hugs  
Ethel

Wind
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Member Elite
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

20 posted 2003-06-27 05:44 PM


sometimes I think just like that. It's a little disturbing but wow- that was amaizing. It goes into my library

I said I'm going to buy a gun and start a war,
If you can tell me something worth fighting for
-coldplay

MysticDreamer
Member
since 2003-04-21
Posts 131

21 posted 2003-06-27 05:53 PM


the spaces between   your words
and the words together leave me breathless

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

22 posted 2004-10-09 11:06 AM



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