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Open Poetry #27
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Free Rent
| Open Poetry #27 |
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Free Rent |
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OwlPoet Junior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 17Fullerton, California, Urantia |
Free Rent This room is in the middle of the house next to the pond where the cat lives. Outside the windows, the sunflowers won't sprout and I pay no rent. What gives? Along the fence the berries climb on stolen trellises where the bells play. The place is surrounded by descendents of wolves. Still I stay. Some of these trees here rain gold in summer. The hedges shed western stars. I watch goddesses dance with an eastern moon. This movie is in black and white. Across the lake, I feel the wind drawing ladies in the night. I color the pages with old pastels as gulls take wing in summer flight. Will Patrick |
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| © Copyright 2003 Will Patrick - All Rights Reserved | |||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
interesting piece of work.. the images juxtaposed on each other as they are creating a surreal feel of chaotic involvement in the location and a sense of being lost and not knowing quite why... |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
it kinda feels like, you don't know why you're there, but it isn't so bad, so you just stay..sort of like, making the best of it?? at any rate, it was interesting to read  (jeez...I sound like you Ron  )[This message has been edited by SEA (06-24-2003 06:21 PM).] |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Part of me felt like you were making bad of a good thing. Then another part of me felt that you were making good of a bad thing! Whatever your intent or feelings behind this write, I found it an interesting read!  Warm hugs, EA |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Very much enjoyed the read... Fantastic imagery! ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ ~If you haven't heard the sunset, |
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OwlPoet Junior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 17Fullerton, California, Urantia |
This was written some time ago when I was banished to another room during my estrangement with my ex when we were still living together. I posted it here today to see if the imagery and tempo would elicit any one else's experiences. Will Patrick |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
They did mine, but then you KNOW what those are, and were then.....nuff said.... This has always been one of my favorites of yours, because it is so scattered in time, viewpoint and imagery, but still focuses narrowly on its theme....Nobody can do that, not even Will, but there it is right there on the page. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I can see this, in a way I can relate |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Some of these trees here rain gold in summer. The hedges shed western stars. I'd love these lines even if I didn't understand a bit of the rest. *S* But I think I do... such a free rent as this costs a lot, doesn't it? *S* |
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Bonfirelight Member
since 2003-06-19
Posts 85London, England |
Great stuff  |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
This room is in the middle of the house next to the pond where the cat lives. Outside the windows, the sunflowers won't sprout and I pay no rent. What gives? Did she almost have you out in the dog house? LOL Seriously, this reminded me a little bit of the old movie with Michael Douglas...I think it was "Fatal Attraction"? Anyway, they were separated but lived in the same house, because of these same reasons. I'll bet you were glad to get out of there, weren't you?  Hugs  Ethel |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
somehow that rent didn't sound free to me interesting write, full of jumbled imagery, a messed up bed full of nightmare scenes?this reads like my brain some mornings, especially before the java jumps on board  |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
OwlPoet Sad, to be a stranger in your own house...learning a new view of something so familiar, like a relationship. |
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timothysangel1973
since 2001-12-03
Posts 1725Never close enough |
I lived in a room like that for 9 years.....so YES I can relate! Wonderful piece! |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
I agree, when I was reading this, I felt like you were shedding bad light onto a good thing, but then again, maybe this isn't what you want! Although, I did enjoy the images painted here of nature, hopefully you make the right choice that well suits your needs. ARCTIC WIND |
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