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Open Poetry #27
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littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York

0 posted 2003-06-23 04:35 PM



Sun shining
through my window
birds chirping
summer

ahhhhh . . .

Tides
about my ankles
splashing children
sandcastles
breeze blowing
long hair whipping
wind

Flowers blooming
madly
ones I have planted
with these hands
which now shake

When nothing
satiates this ache
and my hands clasped
retailiate
like a magnet
repelling itself

When none of this
sparks the light
to be reborn
as once was
in these eyes
my smile
inside of my heart

Then nothing shall    

© Copyright 2003 Sue Eckam - All Rights Reserved
Black Swan
Member
since 2003-02-05
Posts 165
on the moon
1 posted 2003-06-23 05:11 PM


I loved that "ahhhhhh..." u threw in there, it's summer what a relief! This was lovely, left me feeling relaxed and ready to go to the beach hehe
~Talia

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
2 posted 2003-06-23 05:27 PM


ahhhh yes! Experiencing life with a K.I.S.S.--Keeping it simple, sweetheart!

Loves 'n hugs,
Linda

Ceinwyn
Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175
VA
3 posted 2003-06-23 05:32 PM


smiles n nods..short simple and uhh refreshing??

If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried.

Edder
Senior Member
since 2003-04-02
Posts 671

4 posted 2003-06-23 05:41 PM


"ahhhhh..."
a breath of air
fresh and true
straight from the heart
of lovely Sue!

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
5 posted 2003-06-23 05:49 PM


Yes! Ahhhhhh, finally.

Needed to see this one. Thanks Susie!

icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
6 posted 2003-06-23 06:20 PM


I read this and felt a great sadness.  I guess I misunderstand it.  It is still a lovely poem.
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
7 posted 2003-06-23 06:49 PM


I just feel like reaching out to you ..... to be touched by the sun! Every day we are born anew into the LIGHT. You shine so bright!
I feel like icebox .... I hope you will be able to surrender to the beauty which IS.
Hugs, dear beautiful Sue.
Margherita

David Carrson
Junior Member
since 2003-06-23
Posts 25
Carrickfergus N. Ireland
8 posted 2003-06-23 07:02 PM


Brought the beach right back to me!!!!
Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
9 posted 2003-06-23 07:20 PM


I too felt a sadness.  After an initial
flurry of very warm scenes,  in the end
the mood shifts to what is within,  not
what is outside...  An excellent write.

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
10 posted 2003-06-23 07:37 PM


Talia - TY yes the beach - please do go

Linda - yes if life were that simple indeed
thank you

Kris lol - the smile and nod were perfect
thank you

Edder - so very sweet to me thank you

Ed - your welcome - for what?  I do not know . . .  thank you

ice - you didnt misunderstand a thing - you are right on the money - thank you for seeing deeper

Margherita - again - insight . . . and God I do try - I really do - thank you you are so very sweet to me

David - awesome - I need to go back myself
thank you

Magnus - exactly - yes - what is inside
thank you for seeing within sincerely

Thanks guys
xxoo

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
11 posted 2003-06-23 07:39 PM


Beautiful write Sue...but such a sad ending...
full of great longing.
Be well..be happy.
~Smiles & Gentle Hugs, Nancy~

~If you haven't heard the sunset,
   you haven't been listening.~

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
12 posted 2003-06-23 07:56 PM


LittleWing~
I think this is just elegantly done~

'Tides
about my ankles
splashing children
sandcastles
breeze blowing
long hair whipping
wind'


I'm soooooooo there~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
   noles1@totcon.com   

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
13 posted 2003-06-23 08:00 PM


Nancy = thank you - all I need to do is go and read you and I will smile again

Marge - can you leave me directions please?
thank you

Thanks guys
xxoo

Startime55
Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148
Alberta, Canada
14 posted 2003-06-23 08:04 PM


*sigh* such a feeling this poem gave me...In my mind that is what makes a truly great poem....when it makes me feel I judge it great...so this one is judge great...Thank you for sharing it...

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
15 posted 2003-06-23 08:25 PM


Star - thank you . . .
I really needed to hear that
xxoo

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
16 posted 2003-06-23 09:16 PM


When nothing
satiates this ache
and my hands clasped
retailiate
like a magnet
repelling itself
*****
c'mere my friend, you need a big cyberhug

Jason Lyle
Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438
With my darkling
17 posted 2003-06-24 02:05 AM


So beautiful...so sad...then, so beautiful.

Jason

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
18 posted 2003-06-24 02:07 AM


Kacy  . . . yes I do TY sis
thank you so much

Jason . . . lol . . . exactly
thank you

Thanks guys
xxoo

[This message has been edited by littlewing (06-24-2003 02:07 AM).]

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
19 posted 2003-06-24 03:39 AM


hmmm...a happy sad poem...those are neat too, but I like the happy on you better
Bonfirelight
Member
since 2003-06-19
Posts 85
London, England
20 posted 2003-06-24 03:55 AM


Definate shift of mood..still lakes and all that.
long hair whipping wind - that is a great phrase!

Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665

21 posted 2003-06-24 07:38 AM


The summer wind was in my hair, so much so i swear is was there..

great writng suz.

thank you Goldenrose.


Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

22 posted 2003-06-24 08:15 AM


It is a feeling of lost, when those things we have so enjoyed in the past...that were or are so much a part of us don't give us the joy or simply get lost in our own internal struggles... you wrote it well...

nice work...and I'm sorry..if it is true, this is the way you feel... you are far too talented and kind for this to be your lot in life...


garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
23 posted 2003-06-24 10:24 AM


Little One, I was feeling good and thought you were smiling until I got to here......

When none of this
sparks the light
to be reborn
as once was
in these eyes
my smile
inside of my heart

Then nothing shall


And it hurt me, Sue...I know that one day something or someone will bring the smile from inside your heart out again.  

Heart hugs
Ethel    

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
24 posted 2003-06-24 12:51 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Sue, this sounds a little sad, dearest friend, know only YOU can make summer days like this possible so just reach deep in your heart and paint rainbows and smiley-face suns, yay! (sigh) Here's special angel friendship hugs for you, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sue, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story

***Shakira***

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

25 posted 2003-06-24 01:31 PM


beautifully written...a lovely heart you have.  
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

26 posted 2003-06-24 01:31 PM


beautifully written, what lovely heart you have....
Broken
Member
since 2000-03-12
Posts 271
The woods
27 posted 2003-06-28 08:16 PM


Like Lee wrote, what a lovely heart you must have. I tuuuuuuuuuuly love your stuff, it's so ..........something else.

Yours truly
~Broken~

Such griefs with such men well agree,
But wherefore, wherefore fall on me ?
To be beloved is all I need,
And whom I love, I love indeed.

S.T.C

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
28 posted 2003-06-28 08:22 PM


Dix - exactly - a happy/sad poem - but geez arent they all like that?  Thank you

Thank you Bonfire - love your name

Thank you Phil yw - glad you liked

Ron - you have got me pegged with the interpretation exactly and how very sweet of you to say such nice things to me - thank you

Ethel - I hope so too like really soon and I am sorry this hurt

Thank you Noah for always seeing the light inside of me

Lee - so very sweet to me thank you

Broken - as I adore your writing very much so . . . sooo something else . . . I love that . . . as is yours truly
thank you

Thanks guys
xxoo  

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
29 posted 2003-06-28 08:24 PM


Flowers blooming
madly
ones I have planted
with these hands
which now shake

When nothing
satiates this ache
and my hands clasped
retailiate
like a magnet
repelling itself

~*~

You went from the ahhhhhh
to a solitary figure...
in one fell swoop.

Well done Sue.

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

30 posted 2003-06-28 08:52 PM


with a warm and positive attitude as such, how could one miss...lovely write, much enjoyed!
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
31 posted 2003-06-28 08:56 PM


Thank you Karilea means a lot coming from you

Thanks Lee -
xxoo

Yu Lan
Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462
New Zealand
32 posted 2003-06-29 02:49 AM


I hope that 'when' never comes littlewing, that you'll always find something to spark your light! A very sweet poem...

Bless your cotten sockies, you poetic maniacs. ^_^

Love - Lynne

timothysangel1973
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 2001-12-03
Posts 1725
Never close enough
33 posted 2003-06-29 04:50 AM




Exquisite write happy or sad, I loved it!

Tima C

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
34 posted 2003-06-29 07:42 AM


it feels like sadness on a sunny day........

like being a potted plant
in a field of wildflowers
does this make sense?
this runs deep, sue; beautiful

Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
35 posted 2003-06-29 08:25 AM


Lovely images...but, then a sense of trying to recapture the energy, pain-free days of youth...to be "reborn."

A great write.

Patricia

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
36 posted 2003-06-30 12:39 PM


Thank you Lynne for such a sweet wish

Thank you Tima - so very much

Michele - EXACTLY YES YES YES you got it
thank you

Thank you Patricia - ahhh yes indeed

Thanks guys
xxoo

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