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Open Poetry #27
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1971
| Open Poetry #27 |
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1971 |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York 
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I am quite disheartened this I must confess For you my flesh and blood flesh and blood cold, cold blood Oh, you bore me your womb from whence I came You cried when I was born in pain I'm going insane I never thought never quite dared to surmise that my back once turned the dagger driven hitting cartilage and muscle Can you hear this, Mother? listen closely . . . You have heard this many times before What? You do not remember? Oh, I have forgotten when it gets hot you simply walk away If I begged you on my knees bleeding, starving and dirty Would you then be proud of me? Is that what it takes my blood spilled once again upon your table? You bore me yes, you did unwanted child I am me I do not belong to you I never did You left me the day my eyes turned blank and black and dead So please, listen closely next time you drive that dagger, Mother sleep sweet slumber please for me? For in the confines of your mind I shall be to greet you arms wide open smiling In the stillness of this perfect dream listen . . . |
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| © Copyright 2003 Sue Eckam - All Rights Reserved | |||
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
Is that what it takes my blood spilled once again upon your table doesn't it take that sometimes to get through, and even then i wonder........ heartfelt words, sue, thankfully not my mom, shes an earth angel, my dad .........well thats another story |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
I believe you have penned the difference in an age gap between parent and child...which can sometime be very difficult...this was an astounding poem, and a pleasure reading, since I am a parent now...perhaps I'll learn from your words...thank you |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
For in the confines of your mind I shall be to greet you arms wide open smiling nice to see these words right in between... please be  regards sudhir |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
this tears at teh reader..with the palpable feelings you convey... for teh poem.I say well done.. for the feelings I say.. I understand..and would wish you peace at some point..and understanding.. |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
blood may be thicker than wine but i prefer the taste wine leaves inmy mouth..family is too bitter |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
tho the year would be different..you have penned my pain. wrenchingly poingnant write Poetess LW... we heal in the words...I purged the hurt in my poetry long ago...putting it a place that it rarely touches me anymore..I hope the same for you.  No matter what the differences |
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pisumnux Junior Member
since 2003-06-11
Posts 49Troy, NY |
My parents used to be nice people (or so I thought) but in the past few months, certain things have come up that have caused a lot of turmoil. They tried to tug on the cord, I tried to cut it, they just pulled a little more. Never proud of me. Good write. "There are three things men can do with women: love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature." |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
have to agree with Raph Sue, this is a sad write, tragic...no child should be unwanted, or a mistake. It was my dad that didn't want me, my mom did, but she died when I was ten...makes me wish he would have died instead. [This message has been edited by passing shadows (06-19-2003 01:37 PM).] |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
This is an interesting argument. I've felt this way myself many times before. While it's easy to say that you're detached from your mother and an individual person, not her possession, not a thing that she owns or can instruct, you should keep in mind the idea of what it's like to have a child... See, I think about children, I think about having children, and I think of how wonderful it would be for me and the person I love to produce something that is a splice of our characteristics... and to raise and guide that child into the best life possible. But then, I wonder whether or not our creation would be willing to follow our guidance, that they might turn on me, even deny me... and that saddens me... However, I see what you're saying, and it's the truer truth from the individual perspective. I can't really understand until I've been there, but I think I have some idea how parents feel... You've written this reasonably well, Littlewing... there's a few cliches, but nothing too huge or that sticks out all that much. I like the whispered offside italics parts that add a bit of variety... that was a nice way to keep it fresh and interesting from start to finish. Well written... Brian Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world. |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
I can't begin to imagine, but I feel your pain in every way. Warm and caring hugs to you Suz~ |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Sue...this is amazing. First, I must admit, you look very much like a friend of mine who, in all honesty, could have written this very poem. And she is about your age. I wonder...if you're twins. |
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S Arthur Grey Senior Member
since 2001-03-19
Posts 719woven by a poet's loom |
I wonder how many of us here found ourselves unwanted, by a mother, no less. Or worse, were reminded by a lifetime of it . . . I hope the bitterness is not so long for you. Write about it as much as you need to, it can help purge the poison. s.a.g. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Littleone, you know that I'm rarely ever speechless, but now I am............ Just remember I'm always here if you need me.......   |
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gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA |
i'm listening, and you, are amazing. truly truly amazing sue. so glad you came to join us here. xxx |
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dreambuilder Member
since 2003-03-23
Posts 319caddyshack |
Just when I think my mother is disarmed & truly wanting to embrace me - I feel the pierce of the dagger. As I lay wounded & bleeding she glances over her shoulder & says I love you, keep in touch. I could relate more to this poem than I care to admit on the boards. Also,I had to notice brians comment, as I have raised children. As he mentioned - giving them encouragement & spending as much time as possible - makes all the difference in the world.But, some parents just don't realize what they are doing.Thats the unworthy reason I give for my mom. Excellent write littlewing I am sure you are an excellent mom I'm here if you ever want to talk Gopher to lift yer spirits? - lol |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
 (big hugggsssssssss) Oh Sue, this is so sadly beautiful, dearest friend, I too share the same thoughts as Local Prasite, yet that is a risk I am willing to take, for I only want to follow His word and let live a child who can show light for the future and I must contribute myself too and hope as a bonus I can love a child with all heart and not deny it! (sigh) God Bless You, dearest friend, I send many healing hugs your way, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Sue, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
The year is different, that's about all except the ending isn't the same for me. I understand this hurt, but can only say that much, and offer heart hugs. |
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Broken Member
since 2000-03-12
Posts 271The woods |
That's it, you're going in my library Sounds like you didn't have a very happy childhood, and that's something everyone deserves. Innocent as we all where then. Yours truly ~Broken~ Such griefs with such men well agree, |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
this is your best Sue this is your heart shaking head here wow hug you damn... |
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Brad Majors
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647Georgia |
very well done! |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
Reading you makes me extremely grateful for the parents I had. I wish everyone could have good parents. But in spite of my father's best efforts I turned out not even a fraction of the man he was. So that's the good news -- we're not totally bound. You're a much better woman than your mother. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Michele - thank you well you know I cant be bitter all the time - you know me Lee - wow - learn from me? thank you and yes you nailed it right there Sudhir? thank you I am just being . . . Ron - thank you - didnt mean to tug so hard peace would be nice yes . . . today I am at peace Raph yes exactly I prefer a nice Chardonnay to Red Wine any day thank you I know you know too well xxoo Janet - I had NO idea anyone would even resond to this - I was going to pull it but a little animal friend of mine changed my mind . . . happy and sad that you relate well thank you P - yes yes yes and hoping they see what they should be proud of thank you so much Dix; you know my step-dad died when I was 15 and my uncle two weeks ago - they raised me Not that my mom is hoorible - far from it but you know . . . thank you Dixie Brian - thanks for the crit and yes I know - I am Queen of Cliche I wish you the best in the future and the only thing I can say about children is when I bore my own son I swore SWORE to myself that he would never go one single day without being loved by me Thanks Brian Thank you Lori I needed those hugs here too Sue xxoo Karilea: how freaky! God your poor friend . . . if she is my twin she must be confused . . . no wait maybe SHE has the answers lol - thank you see you made me smile somehow Arthur: how very sweet of you to acknowledge my pain and allow me to pass it to you here THAT alone means the world to me thank you OMG I have made Ethel speechless lol I do know and am grateful thank you Ethel truly Dream - you are reading my mind 'God disarm!! How do they get these weapons and where? I agree 100% and yes the gopher made me smile HUGE thank you Noah - exactly! All I can do is love him and guide him the best I know how and so can you - thank you Kacy damnnnn why such tough lives? sorry you relate really - leaves a bitter taste on my tongue Thank you and I am sorry Broken - wow - what a compliment - thank you and well it was happy but not - you know? Thank you - if only I could see again as my son does . . . Bri? thank you and yes I needed a hug very badly . . . Thank you Brad! LR - yes please be grateful - please - I am grateful very much for my parents - they just need to see me moreso than they think they do Your last words there . . . are imprinted in my soul thank you Thank you everyone for reading this rather spiteful and despising write of mine It had to come out or else I would have bursted . . . So good to me - all of you are my family - truly Thank you xxoo |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
and thus, you are born again... love you Sue. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
wow....no really....wow |
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Goldenrose Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665 |
sue this is the most personal of your poems, you must have took some time before you decided to post it. being from a big family like me does not mean they are all there for you i only realy get along with one brother and his family. if you were my sister i would love you. Thank you for opening your soul to us, it is a very great and loving soul, haunted by past ghosts. Goldenrose. |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
I, too, know this pain. You have expressed it perfectly here. Patricia |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Sue....This must have been difficult at best to write. but, you did so extremely well. ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Phil: if you were my sister i would love you. This is by far - the sweetest sentiment and you know - we ARE all family here so your forced to love me heheheh Thank you Phil I needed that truly. xxoo Thank you Patricia - geez I wish you didnt knoe but glad you can relate thank you Nancy - I was going to pull it felt so bad after I wrote it, ya know? But, glad it stayed . . . it needed to escape - thank you Thanks Vandana so very much Thanks guys once agaon for making me feel OK xxoo |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
*holds onto you tightly* I'm accomodating this to 1980 lol..sorry hmm I told you I suck at comments hrmmph...unwanted clings to me right now I was told many times that I was a mistake but we all know nobody is a mistake except for my mother and step mother  you know for real your poetry surpasses the confinements of these blue pages you breathe life and the courage I fail to express at times, lol i'm done kissing up now  If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
ahahah Kris - you made me smile again thank you but ummmm . . . I just tossed my pen into the trash after reading you lol It's nice to have friends you know? Who can relate. Thank you for this and your replys are perfect. xxoo |
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Ringo
since 2003-02-20
Posts 3684Saluting with misty eyes |
OUCH!!!!!!!!!!! Very Simply ****ing OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!! You know, Sue... I don't even know what the heck to write. This is by far the absolute best you have ever written on these pages. Once in a dream, far beyond these castle walls... |
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KristieSue
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460PA, US |
I have always wondered what I would say to my mother if I had the guts. I think you've put it wonderfully. Great job, and I too am sorry that you've had to live this as well. But, like you said, it made you someone you can now respect, right? I mean, I guess I wouldn't be so strong in some areas of my life if I hadn't been raised the way I had. HUGGLES Sue.... Failure isn't failure if a lesson from it is learned ~ KS |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Brad: thank you so much - adda couple extras F's to that lol - and you are much to good to me here . . . Thank you truly I needed that Kristie - you are absolutely 100% right indeed thank you Thanks guys xxoo |
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christian Member
since 2002-12-18
Posts 331 |
oh god. that was so beautiful. it hit me on so many levels that not even i can imagine. thank you so much for this, wow. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Thank you christian for reading my soul truly xxoo |
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timothysangel1973
since 2001-12-03
Posts 1725Never close enough |
OMG! Sue, this is wonderful! Ya know, mama's and daughter's have been battling since the dawn of time. I think all of us gal's can say that we have been here once or twice! This is a masterpeice to behold, and I don't know how in the heck I missed it! ...I think it was on page 99...hehe, I'm out digging in the shadows tonight!  [This message has been edited by timothysangel1973 (07-23-2003 02:01 AM).] |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Sue...I honestly thought I had replied to this, but I'm not seeing my name...so I add it now. I don't have the words to do this justice, but just know that this touched me deeply. You've spilled your heart in this piece, and I thank you for that. Even through the pain, it is beautiful. Hugs, ~Vicky "My friends are my estate." |
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Jason Lyle Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438With my darkling |
What could I really add to these replies I love this. Jason |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Tima, thank you for digging . . . makes me smile indeed xxoo Vicky, you are so sweet and yes we spill our souls here dont we? Thank you Jason *smile* always always patting me on the back thank you thanks guys xxoo |
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