I believe we all are responsible for viewing marriage in our younger days as an unrealistic fantasy...in the real world there are problems, and sometimes the only way some people can deal with them, or escape them, is to leave...I believe our society has become one of quick fixes, fast foods, etc..., therefore, somewhere along the line, we are loosing the ability to be able to understand, that along with problems in a marriage comes patience, strength, respect, as the tides change and grow, so to do relationships...we love each other unconditionally, meaning...respect the other person's growth, needs for fulfillment and individual happiness...? It is a work in progress meaning, there will be times when we disapoint each other, fail each other and make mistakes, but the good news is...as long as we retain that mutual respect for each other, we will be able to work together listening to each other instead of acting out in childish stubborness, and anger?
Our society teaches we must be married or a couple to be successful and we don't. Our society reads love novels and romance stories which are hollywood and not realistic...but, people actually buy this stuff and think a marriage is the same.
Look at marriages that are successful, and there are, there is a lot of give and take...but basically, the couple was mature and happy before meeting each other, they were confident in themselves, were very successful already, and simply blended the alreay commodities they possessed which trickeled into their marriage, they were compatible, and enjoyed the same hobbies and feelings...they were able to look at love as extra added benefit to their already contented life...meaning, they didn't expect anyone to save them, or make them happy, or pull them from this pit of agony. They didn't believe that life was empty without each other, they knew that life would be simply more complementing with each other...and through mature understanding, mutual patience and listening, with an ability to allow each to grow as an individual...i.e. continue their education, their hobbies, allowing their individuality, they to this day remain successful and are only happy together, b/c they were happy, content, upheld a moral obligation to themselves, were confident and knew what they were looking for, without compromise or great expection...