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Would It Be Wrong?

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Robin Goodfellow
Junior Member
since 06-29-99
Posts 26


0 posted 08-18-99 01:16 AM       View Profile for Robin Goodfellow   Email Robin Goodfellow   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Robin Goodfellow

If you could fill the role of any personna at your whim, would it be wrong to pretend to be someone who cares for the sake of a person in need?
Since the day I was born I have played the role of any character you can think of. The hero, the poet, the scholar, the banker, the sensitive friend, the jerk you name it I've done it. The only reason I do is because I have no real identity. I am a living contradiction of myself. I am an equal part of every single trait possible. Since I have no one major quality I have spent my whole life "acting" in front of everyone. Picking the character that best fit the situation. So that the other person will feel at ease with me. This has caused for a stressing lifestyle because many women confuse the instant connection I make for them for love. When in fact I have little love for anyone be it family or friend.
My question to you is:

Is it wrong to build these false connections with people? I know that it is immoral to toy with peoples deepest feelings but my only thought was to make them feel better. Is it my fault they mistake my attention towards them for love? Wait this sounds like I'm on a shrink's couch. I wont drag you into my personal life. Let me rephrase the question.
Is it wrong to lie to someone in order to prevent them further pain?
elvira
Senior Member
since 07-06-99
Posts 985
California


1 posted 08-18-99 03:37 AM       View Profile for elvira   Email elvira   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for elvira



[This message has been edited by elvira (edited 08-22-99).]
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


2 posted 08-18-99 09:08 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

But Robin -
We are, in fact, the sum total of our own experiences
lenny
Member
since 07-11-99
Posts 68
front royal, va. u.s.a.


3 posted 08-18-99 05:20 PM       View Profile for lenny   Email lenny   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lenny

It seemed to me that you were not really expressing yourself fully, as if you were holding back--perhaps already knowing the answer to your own question which for some reason or another you would not allow yourself to fully place in the open here. You say that you don't love anyone, not even family or friends so it would seem that playing these caring games are, in a way, to serve something in you. That would make your actions indeed wrong. "So that the other person would feel at ease with me." It sounds like you are doing these things to make yourself feel at ease with others, which would not only be very selfish but, in leading someone on, also very cruel. You have modified your question three times, each time tempering it a little to make it appear softer. If you have been aware of the pain your actions cause others for your whole life then you evidently know that it is wrong and that you are harming people. Saying that you don't love anyone and that you know your lieing and pretending have caused pain for many I don't see the need for your asking this question. Lies, no matter what the excuse, never lead to anything good for anyone. But then maybe I should just tell you that I think it's all okay to go on like this so that there is no friction between us and I won't have to feel nervous about your possible reply. I'm sorry, but you asked and I see so many hurt faces in my mind's eye. It's never too late to change and change can be like a wonderful enema after years of constipation. Good luck, and if you cannot love then at least try to follow the conscience that drove you to ask this question.

------------------
lenny
skysight
Junior Member
since 08-14-99
Posts 21


4 posted 08-20-99 01:51 AM       View Profile for skysight   Email skysight   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for skysight

As an 'actress' who has been there and done that when it comes to the behavior cited above, I can't exactly say I'm in a position to tell you whether you're right or wrong. I know I've hurt people in my life, and I know you have too. To me, the things I see people getting from my relating to them and, oh, I don't know, helping them along, sometimes outways the eventual hurt that ensues. Beware, though, for chameleon-like acting catches up to you when you need someone to be there for you. They think they're doing everything right for you and they don't have a clue as to who you really are inside, underneath. Do you always wear a mask? Have you ever found love? People change, granted, but this voice of experience says acting can hurt more than help. Peace and love.
Amorphous
New Member
since 09-18-99
Posts 3
Stacy, MN 55079


5 posted 09-18-99 11:21 PM       View Profile for Amorphous   Email Amorphous   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Amorphous

If people are stupid enough not to hold their feelings in check. They deserve whatever is coming to them.

------------------
Those who search for shapes, find sqaures.

Amorphous

 
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