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Open Poetry #26
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Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2003-06-03 03:41 PM


She wore the sky
In stretch of arm to meet sunrise
Feet planted in firmament
Where soil tickled between toes
As she wiggled soles
In search of better grounding
For fear the spirit she exposed
Would take in flight her all
But leave the shell behind
And what was left
Be her bane of existence
For the remaining time
Allotted mere souls
Such as hers…

I watched
With heat rising in me
At the curve of flesh
And fire of eyes saying come closer
That I might enfold you to
In the world of me…
But I feared what I would take.

My base desires to spoil
With the fingerprints left
Red on white
Where in press of flesh
I bruised tender or marred the image
She felt of clean

I would in pick of flower
Deny the garden one bloom

So,
She wore the sky
And I wore thunder
Which still rumbles when I think
Of how she felt beneath me
With flashes of lightning
Going through us both
Before I chose to let her
Ride off on clouds
I knew
I could never understand
For clouds are not of earth
Or clay as am I

© Copyright 2003 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2003-06-03 03:49 PM


grumble


grin


you KNOW I LOVE THIS---

expletives and mutters mumble sad?

sigh.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2003-06-03 03:51 PM



Just let me sit
and admire quietly...

while tucking it into my library...

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
3 posted 2003-06-03 04:02 PM


Hmm....
Well, the word masterpiece comes to mind.
Into my favorites library, so I can read it as often as I like.

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
4 posted 2003-06-03 04:58 PM


Excellent!
TD

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

5 posted 2003-06-03 05:17 PM


Ser.... you do indeed grumble a lot at me... keep that up and I'll get a complex or something
I'm glad you liked.... thank you for the read and the time...

Sunshine: certainly take your time and enjoy..lol.. sometimes it takes a good while to find the enjoyment in what I write..

thank you ma'am for the thoughts and the words.

Midnight: Masterpiece..around here that is a BBQ sauce and a place to eat.. it probably fits them better than me.. but I certainly thank you for the kind words and the thoughts.... you are far too kind.

TD.. thank you kind lady...although excellent is a strong word to use when it comes to my poetry...

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
6 posted 2003-06-03 09:21 PM


That is NOT what I meant!  

LOL...So I'm back already...what can I say....it is a most enjoyable read...one I can say is full of imagery...which is very much appreciated.

So there.

Edder
Senior Member
since 2003-04-02
Posts 671

7 posted 2003-06-03 09:45 PM


one word.....WOW!
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
8 posted 2003-06-03 09:50 PM


...

..once again you have rendered me speechless.
*grins*

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
9 posted 2003-06-03 10:07 PM


Ron...seems you get better and better...so don't fight it.  This was so good!
brian sites
Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475
usa
10 posted 2003-06-03 10:22 PM


she wore the sky
and I wore thunder


man.....
this is wonderful Ron
enjoyed it

Drexler_McStyles
Member
since 2002-11-18
Posts 195
Venice, Ca
11 posted 2003-06-03 11:00 PM


I dont usually post replies, but I liked this..a nice style, I enjoyed the way you laid down the tale...

D.

Larry C
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
12 posted 2003-06-03 11:07 PM


Ron,
The ladies are swooning. Cool!

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

apoetdreams
Member
since 2003-06-01
Posts 52
NJ, USA
13 posted 2003-06-03 11:13 PM


Wonderful write. Ditto to above   !
Make your words as sweet as honey, someday you may have to eat them.

[This message has been edited by apoetdreams (06-03-2003 11:14 PM).]

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
14 posted 2003-06-04 04:18 AM


DAMN!
garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
15 posted 2003-06-04 04:26 AM


So,
She wore the sky
And I wore thunder
Which still rumbles when I think
Of how she felt beneath me
With flashes of lightning
Going through us both
Before I chose to let her
Ride off on clouds
I knew
I could never understand
For clouds are not of earth
Or clay as am I


Goodness, this is good, Capt. Ron.
I'm keeping it, too. Okay?
Hugs  
Ethel

chinesestone
Member
since 2003-06-04
Posts 76
China
16 posted 2003-06-04 04:30 AM


good
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
17 posted 2003-06-04 10:46 AM


"For fear the spirit she exposed
Would take in flight her all
But leave the shell behind
And what was left
Be her bane of existence"

I know someone like her...but she is doing better with each passing day...thanks to her friends...

What you write always touches me in places that don't usually get touched.  Thank you.

Susan C.


suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
18 posted 2003-06-05 03:50 PM


From the first line, I was hooked. *S* And the last verse is just spectacular... like this SO much, Cap'n!!! *S*
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
19 posted 2003-06-05 03:54 PM


well Ron, all I have to say is

this is a spectacular write and to be honest
I think I love this one out of all the  great poems you have written...

I am going to save it and when I feel lonely
I can read it and remember that there are SOME out there who DO feel and CAN express..
thank you, this  has been an unexpected pleasureable find...

M

gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
20 posted 2003-06-05 04:15 PM


She wore the sky
In stretch of arm to meet sunrise
Feet planted in firmament
Where soil tickled between toes
As she wiggled soles
In search of better grounding
For fear the spirit she exposed
Would take in flight her all
But leave the shell behind


  This powerful beauty had me with goosebumps all over. its funny how when you read poems and you sometimes see colours when u picture them, here i saw a wonderful mysterious sky of purples and blues.

just beautiful ron.. and into my library, so thanks.

lots of love, gemma x

learning each day, for you and i, our paths have met, i've already learnt that you are love.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

21 posted 2003-06-08 01:01 PM


I was gonna fuss at you for posting all this amazing poetry while the moth was on a break, but somehow, after reading this...i just dont have the fuss left in me ...theres no room next to all the poetic admiration.
Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
22 posted 2003-06-08 01:35 PM


Cpat...as TD said..."Excellent"....and to
your reply...a simple "Pahhh"....because it
certainly is...excellent!!

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
23 posted 2003-06-08 01:50 PM


Well done! Well done! An excellent excursion into theme-building through progressive imagery.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
24 posted 2003-06-09 07:54 PM


Ron:

HUGE smile . . .

God you write with such passion -

beautiful
xxoo

Kellsue
Member
since 2000-05-06
Posts 210
Waukesha, WI USA
25 posted 2003-06-09 08:00 PM


Powerful and passionate - excellent write!

~Kelly


Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
26 posted 2003-06-09 09:59 PM




(smiles) Earth and air should always coincide well together, sweet friend, even when nature plays cruel tricks! (big hugggsssssss) Then, what's the point of gravity? (big hugggsssssss) I love this, dearest friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story

***Shakira***

gyiel marlok
Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 145
OHIO
27 posted 2003-06-09 10:16 PM


turn  this into a hardcore song
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