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Open Poetry #26

I can't feel anything

LastMoments
Member

since 2003-03-07

Posts 92

0 posted 2003-05-28 09:10 PM

I can't feel anything
My heart is ripped bone dry
Letting out the finals wisps
Of the death inside
Everything a time apart
Where nothing's making sense
And in my eyes lives the whore
Of dirty consequence
I can't be fixed, I'm torn wounds
I'm the scream you can't forget
The ringing inside your ears
The hallucination of your whimpers
And in the end I'm standing here
The figure you can't meet
The lust on the tip of your lips
A kiss left incomplete
I want you to take me
I want you to find
The final piece thats left of me
The final piece thats left

Of nothing, of hatred, of pain

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

1 posted 2003-05-28 09:57 PM

this rips into the soul..
Welcome, if I haven't already said so. I don't believe I've read your work before.

You could hurt me with your bare hands. You could hurt me using the sharp edge of what you say. JEWEL

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

2 posted 2003-05-28 10:06 PM

My first read of your work, and welcome to Passions.
Truly written of a heartache, but numbness is not evident here. Expressed very well.
ThisDiamond

Saunni
Senior Member

since 2000-07-11

Posts 1777
West Virginia

3 posted 2003-05-28 10:41 PM

So much heart here and well expressed!

Sauni:)The Only Time I See The Sun Is When I'm Within That Vanilla Breeze.The Only Time I'm One With The Sun Is When He Shelters Me From The Rain. L.S

Jason Lyle
Senior Member

since 2003-02-07

Posts 1438
With my darkling

4 posted 2003-05-28 10:53 PM

I love a vicious challenge to challenge.Nice post and welcome.

Jason

WhiteRose
Member Elite

since 2002-07-23

Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon

5 posted 2003-05-28 11:26 PM

And in my eyes lives the whore
Of dirty consequence

This couplet completely overwhelmed me. I had to read it again, and again, and again. I'm not sure what to say, accept, hell yeah, I can relate!

lost_star
Member

since 2003-03-15

Posts 114
NY, U.S.A

6 posted 2003-05-29 12:44 PM

very well written

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

7 posted 2003-05-29 02:45 AM

numbness...yeah, I know

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