navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #26 » Ether (pity for the nobody's)
Open Poetry #26
Post A Reply Post New Topic Ether (pity for the nobody's) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
davidmerriman
Member
since 2003-04-30
Posts 123
Dallas, TX

0 posted 2003-05-06 06:51 PM


one of my newest poems, I like it a lot and I hope you do to! I tried to stay true to a rhyme scheme and somewhat of a syllable count.

Ether

Here lies a man who lived in others
Carefully glancing at two lovers,
He knew why he thought above her.
He knew she knew of many others.

He knew the reason of his stutter,
When he prepared to say he loved her.
Never him, always another.
He wished he was one of the others.

Never would he touch his treasure.
And through through others he would measure
His own success. Now a ledger
Placed over his grave forever.

He slipped in and out other's thoughts,
Spirit roaming like a dreadnaught
While breaking through each mind, it sought
After the power its knowledge brought.

He heard it all, the subconscious
Of others; their facade of bliss
Slipped into his own consciousness.
Where did he obtain a gift like this?

For if he rested, cleared his eyes,
Focused, let no blur reside,
And ignore the panorama of lies
Of the faces and places outside,

He would see in third-person view
Himself, a worthless wretch in two
One part shell of a body skewed,
Absorbing his own sense's truth.

And he looked at himself, naked,
And he shook; he could not take it.
Each insignificant break in
His face; each flaw he would take in.

Here he lies dead, though still alive.
He studied others all his life.
And although he enjoyed the knife,
He did not want to tell his wife.

His wife, the one he hated most.
No union, he would always host
And let the screen make him a ghost,
Floating like ether, dead to most.


[This message has been edited by davidmerriman (05-06-2003 06:53 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 David Merriman - All Rights Reserved
Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
1 posted 2003-05-07 10:32 AM


This would be a hit in the Dark Forum!!!!
Quite an interesting write!!!!
Enjoyed!!!!
Bridgette

"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again.  To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown


regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
2 posted 2003-05-07 12:44 PM




Well David,

This is a very interesting poem and requires a few readings to get more from it.

Thanks for posting it.


Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
3 posted 2003-05-07 12:53 PM


For if he rested, cleared his eyes,
Focused, let no blur reside,
And ignore the panorama of lies
Of the faces and places outside,

(half truths maybe, what you see isn't
always what you get, regretfully)

A compelling write to be sure...

davidmerriman
Member
since 2003-04-30
Posts 123
Dallas, TX
4 posted 2003-05-07 04:44 PM


thanks for the comments

I need to edit this poem, there are some typos and such, but thanks for the good words!

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #26 » Ether (pity for the nobody's)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary