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Open Poetry #26
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KoKo
Senior Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow

0 posted 2003-04-19 01:00 AM


And it was the mornings that seemed to crush me...
Like the gravitational pull was stronger
Around my unmade bed.
It was the streaming, sparkling sunlight
That burned my eyes,
Reminding me I wasn't home
And never had been.

And it was the wind that suffocated me,
Wrapping around me the way my Mom used to tie
My winter scarf...
Tight, painful, and highly irritating.

And it was the fire I stood beside
That cooled me down
Once again
Reminding me
I wasn't home.

I don't suppose I'll ever be home
And I don't suppose I'll ever settle
Into one lonely, echoing house
For more than a year.
Sure, that's costly
But when alone in an empty bed
Night after sleepless night
You tend to want new pillows.

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
--Chang Tzu

© Copyright 2003 Lauren - All Rights Reserved
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
1 posted 2003-04-19 04:05 AM


KoKo -

I relate to this so well -
a wandering soul . . .  this is awesome
If you had chosen this - I would have voted for it . . .  amazing write here   xxoo

KoKo
Senior Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow
2 posted 2003-04-19 10:12 AM


Thanks littlewing! You've brightened my day tremendously! Thanks again!

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
--Chang Tzu

Ericc
Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178

3 posted 2003-04-19 12:58 PM


Very nice...creative and full of soft beauty.
Eric

MikeFessel
Member
since 2003-04-19
Posts 321
Brooklyn, NYC, USA
4 posted 2003-04-19 01:27 PM


Oh, this poem is so, so, sad, but oh so good.

"And it was the mornings that seemed to crush me...
Like the gravitational pull was stronger
Around my unmade bed."- Great!

"Reminding me I wasn't home
And never had been."- sigh...heartbraking

"And it was the fire I stood beside
That cooled me down
Once again
Reminding me
I wasn't home."- Wow this is such a good verse.

"But when alone in an empty bed
Night after sleepless night
You tend to want new pillows."- This is so good and sad, it makes me cry.

This is one of the most beautiful and depressing reads for me in a long time. Be sure I'll be scouring this site for more of your work. And I'm sorry you feel this way, I relate to this so much myself. (tear) I hope you do find a home afterall.

             Mike Fessel

P.S.- I love the quote!



passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-04-19 01:58 PM


how deeply this touched me...I can't even explain
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
6 posted 2003-04-19 07:00 PM


I was recently thinking I should buy new pillows...James
KoKo
Senior Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow
7 posted 2003-04-19 09:54 PM


Ericc: Thanks muchly
MikeFessel: Wow! You're really, really MUCH too kind! I'm actually blushing!! I almost never do that! LoL, thank you!!
passing shadows: Your words spoke more than enough. Thank you very much!
James: Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment
Thank you everyone!!!

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.
--Chang Tzu

Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

8 posted 2003-05-03 01:21 AM


How I love this..with all its contrasts, thank you
Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

9 posted 2003-05-03 05:03 AM



This was very enjoyable Koko...

Very nice flow...

Great Job!


Richy


regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
10 posted 2003-05-03 08:05 AM




KoKo,

Oh my, the ache in this mirrored feelings I've had many times. Great imagery and subtle emotions, your choice of words just right. This surely does hit close to 'home'...

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

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