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Open Poetry #26
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A Hirsute Man Is Beating On His Wife
| Open Poetry #26 |
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A Hirsute Man Is Beating On His Wife |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533
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A hirsute man is beating on his wife is this His image mirrored in the manger?** the witness son I fear thinks this is life The blows rain hard when e'er the boozing's rife with every belt he thinks that he can change her a hirsute man is beating on his wife Seeds sown this way are sure to reap in strife assures the next crop all the more estranger the witness son I fear thinks this is life Thus coiled in the legacy lowlife compassion always hides, a perfect stranger a hirsute man is beating on his wife The beast enchants, his song of drum and fife the boy enlists, is culled into the danger the witness son I fear thinks this is life Brute's final act attacks her with a knife and passes on his role as a deranger a hirsute man is beating on his wife the witness son I fear thinks this is life . . . . ** Genesis 1:27 "And God created man in His own image...." hirsute=hairy I love the villanelle |
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| © Copyright 2003 Richard S. Wells jr. - All Rights Reserved | |||
Nightshade 
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Richard, yes, children learn by watching and listening. Some learn to be violent or an abuser of chemicals & drink. Some of us learn to be the caretakers who stay quiet...clean up...carry on. Chilling write here. Chris "Hope" is the thing with feathers- |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
nicely done Richard. I enjoyed |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Richard... this is SO good... and um..kind of intense for me--and even aside from the obvious, I have to say, there's so much more than the outer layers of this. This is what I call a blanket spread verse--meaning--while it is universally applicable, it maintains a quality of intimacy. And oh, there is more than one shade of green here on me for your skill with the Villanelle....it's a form that vexes me and I adore it, as it has that "chanting" quality inherent, and? Rumor has it I am partial to "chant". Mind if I keep this one? (Of course you don't.)  |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoy your read |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
Chris....yes a sad truth for too many families. Some break the cycle however. CPat.....Thanks Serenity..Chant on. If you think about it the villanelle is for lazy folks. 19 lines, 2 repeated four times leaving 11, plus those 2 equals 13 lines of poetry. The trick, I find is seeing that the repeated lines carry their weight throughout the verse. The trick here was that there are only 6 rhyming words for life. Thanks vandana...enjoyed your reading |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
dang! |
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SimplyGold Senior Member
since 2002-07-10
Posts 1453 |
If I may concur with PassingShadows, "dang, dang" I learned something about a villanelle and enjoyed this poem. Gave me the chills. SG |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
And I appreciate the fact that you can perform a Villanelle so well...they are not easy, and it takes a Master of form to perfect them... Well done, Sir Master... |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
I missed this before Richard - great example of course, but would NOT expect you to NOT meet a challenge |
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