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Open Poetry #26
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Black Swan
Member
since 2003-02-05
Posts 165
on the moon

0 posted 2003-04-17 05:54 PM


spinning
twirling
falling
looking down seeing nothing but black
feeling nothing but the lack
of my control
you pushed me
you wanted me
you've got me
until forever
hope you are okay with that
no one can ever change that fact
Trying to start anew
cant see past you
your memories so bright and vivid
in the midst my of gloomy suitors
saying things I wish I could mean
forcing his name
exsisting only to pursue
the thought of bieng free
the thought is only a tease
in punished reality
shadow of frailty
lerking behind us
working to bind us
when can I escape
my own changing termoil ways
break the knife from your wound
use it to destroy another rested soul
there's no hope for ending
just for trying to live
and praying to remain safely
untouched

© Copyright 2003 Talia - All Rights Reserved
jaysh
Member
since 2003-04-16
Posts 133
IL, USA
1 posted 2003-04-17 06:14 PM


i thought it was beautiful and well expressed, keep up the good work, your writing is wonderful.
garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
2 posted 2003-05-28 08:28 PM


Black Swan, this one hurt, it was so sad to me.
But you wrote it very well.
Hugs,  
Ethel

JilGirl
Member
since 2003-05-24
Posts 364
Washington
3 posted 2003-05-28 08:33 PM


Sad, yes ~~ but it's in the ability of expression, where healing begins. You write WELL!

Blessings!
Shirl

Till oceans cease to flow and deserts lose their sands, may beauty surround you every day and wealth be in your hands.

Deep_Inside
Member
since 2002-02-14
Posts 377
i can't stop hiding
4 posted 2003-05-29 11:59 AM


i can here the music that will go with this one, good write
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-05-30 04:34 AM


very good write
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