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Krissy
Senior Member
since 2002-02-22
Posts 556
kent England

0 posted 2003-03-24 05:52 PM



Nothing

Within a mist of grey she waits
Passive not reactive
Neither stepping forward
To grasp the hand of fate
Nor turning her face away
Instead she waits

She knows nothing
The greyness of sorrow
Nor the light of hope
She knows nothing
Reacts to nothing
Simply waits

Sometimes when her mind
Plays tricks she almost
Makes a move
Almost takes a step forward
Or a step back
Only almost
But never quite doing so

She doesn't hear the
Murmurs of hope, love and life
They call gaily constantly
But she doesn't hear them
She doesn't see them
Their faces full of joy
Eager to draw her out to life

She doesn't hear the whispers
Of nameless fears
That crowd at her back
Waiting to pull her down
To swarm over her
And take her to the place
Where she will be tormented
Forever by their unreasoning
Hateful barbs of spite and malice

Instead she hears nothing,
Sees nothing, does nothing,
Surrounded in a cocoon
Of grey mist
Where nothing
Can touch her
And nothing lives
Except the nothing

And so she waits for
Nothing to consume her
As it will

One day

Krissy

And while thy willing soul transpiers
at every pore with instant fires
Andrew Marvell 1621-1678

© Copyright 2003 Krissy P J Searle - All Rights Reserved
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
1 posted 2003-03-24 06:05 PM


Glad to see you posted one for the book Krissy...I remember feeling this way a few years ago...

hugsssss
M

garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
2 posted 2003-03-24 06:13 PM


This is a very good book submission.
Here's my vote....

"Love makes the world go around"
~with love and hugs from Ethel__GG~  
                  

Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
3 posted 2003-03-24 06:14 PM


Krissy beloved daughter of mine, there are times when I’m overwhelmed by the wonder and the magic that is you. This is excellent writing and I vote YES. I would even if you weren’t my darling daughter.

You know I love it utterly utterly utterly xxxx

Love you always
And forever
Mum
xxxxxxxx
You are clever my sweet little cabbages

Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds
but I can face the future with courage brave and bold

Footprints In My Heart
Kethry

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2003-03-24 06:21 PM



Of course, it's a blessed yes...

        Karilea - If I whisper, will you listen?...

Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
5 posted 2003-03-24 06:28 PM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Krissy, this is so very heartfelt, sweet friend, I hope now the sunbeam has shined through your heart as I think we all have nothingness days but we all have lively weeks too! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, you have my vote, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Krissy, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
6 posted 2003-03-24 06:31 PM


a wonderful, though sad write. I've been there a few times myself.
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
7 posted 2003-03-26 09:10 AM


Instead she hears nothing,
Sees nothing, does nothing,
Surrounded in a cocoon
Of grey mist
Where nothing
Can touch her
And nothing lives
Except the nothing

This is simply superb, Krissy... I think one of the things that makes it so sad is that no one can describe this state of existence unless they've experienced it... or watched someone stuck in such limbo, unable to move... unable to return to the person they were before some event sent them seeking the cocoon of nothingness.

An excellent write! *S*

Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
8 posted 2003-03-26 09:37 PM


Krissy beloved daughter giving this a bumpity bump up to the top you go

If I could vote again I would but I know I can't so I won't.

And you know darling one if you keep writing as well as this people will say you can't be my daughter since you are too talented. Should I tell them darling you're the milkman's, or was it the coalman? No, I'd better not........ Love you muchly my sweet cabbages


Love you always
And forever
Mum
xxxxxxxxxx



Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds
but I can face the future with courage brave and bold

Footprints In My Heart
Kethry

[This message has been edited by Marsha (03-26-2003 09:37 PM).]

bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

9 posted 2003-03-27 12:42 PM


This one takes no prisoners with its truth-telling. I love it.
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
10 posted 2003-03-27 01:53 PM


I feel like giving you a great big hig and saying, "There, there, you little darling! I promise you, things will get better...!"

Peace, Love & Light,
Earth Angel

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
11 posted 2003-03-27 03:00 PM


But of course...this is one for the book!
~Smiles & Hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
12 posted 2003-03-27 05:42 PM


Well, I hope book publication will send some sunshine to dispell the gray mists.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
13 posted 2003-03-27 06:06 PM


most wonderful writing miss krissy...!  
much enjoyed the read..

hugs, g

"laughter is the shortest distance between two people"  - victor borge

Larry C
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
14 posted 2003-03-27 07:55 PM


Here's the milkman's vote!

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
15 posted 2003-03-27 09:42 PM


This surpasses anything I've seen you do, Krissy. I wish I had written it...

Definite vote here!!

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
16 posted 2003-03-27 10:25 PM


Nice to see  your submission, Krissy...
ambrish
Member
since 2003-03-27
Posts 257
India
17 posted 2003-03-28 01:37 AM


a nice poem touching heart
Marge Tindal
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since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
18 posted 2003-03-28 08:37 AM


DarlingKrissy~
Can I say ... WONDERFUL ?
Why, of course I can !!
And soooooooooooo ... I do !

'Instead she hears nothing,
Sees nothing, does nothing,
Surrounded in a cocoon
Of grey mist
Where nothing
Can touch her
And nothing lives
Except the nothing'


Eloquently said dearie~


And I love BSquirrels comment !   Yes !

Love and lots of *Huglets* to you my girlie~
Missing you muchly, I am~
*HUGLETS*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com                        

Krissy
Senior Member
since 2002-02-22
Posts 556
kent England
19 posted 2003-03-28 07:17 PM


Thank you everyone I think that you are all so kind and I love you all so dearly.  Thank you for all you are and all your beautiful words.


love and warm stuff
as always
Krissy

And while thy willing soul transpiers
at every pore with instant fires
Andrew Marvell 1621-1678

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
20 posted 2003-03-29 03:58 PM


Well done, Krissy. I see this in another way, to me it was the story of woman in a long coma. See how we all read things differently.   
Sandra

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA
21 posted 2003-03-29 11:08 PM


Very good write.  

      - Cody -

Note To Self:  If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?  

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA
22 posted 2003-03-29 11:08 PM


Very good write.  

      - Cody -

Note To Self:  If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?  

Paul Wilson
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Member Elite
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711
United States
23 posted 2003-03-30 11:57 PM


Krissy~ So touching and emotional. If asked I couldn't pick out my favorite part of this, because I loved it all. Great...Paul

"To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you"

Charisma
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Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
24 posted 2003-03-31 01:22 PM


Was there a few time myself, its amazing how you described these "nothing" so well.........thank you for sharing

((hugs))

Charisma

Joyce Johnson
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912
Washington State
25 posted 2003-04-02 12:41 PM


Of course this is very sad but very well written.  My vote is yes.  Joyce
Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
26 posted 2003-04-02 07:55 PM


Krissy my darling daughter, just giving you a little bumpity bump. You know darling one, this has the most amazing phrasing, it really is a superb piece of writing. Makes me wish I could do free verse, but everyone knows I can’t, I’ll leave the clever stuff to you little cabbages.

Okay back up you go xxx darling daughter well done xxx and since you couldn’t be in the first book, unlike some I could mention. (Says mummy being vastly superior) so I hope you get into this one.

Love you always
And forever
Mum




Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds
but I can face the future with courage brave and bold

Footprints In My Heart
Kethry

[This message has been edited by Marsha (04-02-2003 07:56 PM).]

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
27 posted 2003-04-02 09:53 PM


Takes an awful good poet to write nothing like this and bring it to life.

Powerful and expressive writing~

Much enjoyed~

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
Netherlands
28 posted 2003-04-08 09:30 PM



You got me worried Krissy, not seeing you around. I saved this one big vote for you, glad I can get rid of it now.

Geesh, I missed your beautiful poetry.

Big hugs and knuffels Titia

Like scattered leaves...my words will flow

pjtalty
Member
since 2002-07-17
Posts 111
W.A., Australia
29 posted 2003-04-08 10:20 PM


In my opinion, free verse is difficult to write -that is, to produce a good poem which calls on the emotions/intellects of readers. Some readers regard free verse as no more than "cut-up prose", but a well-written piece of free verse is definitely poetry.

Your piece is a good example of free verse as poetry because of the way you have been able to establish a rhythmic pattern that varies from line to line with the thought and feeling of the moment.

I particularly admire the way in which you have been able to make it attractive to the ear by repeated rhythmic cadences not usually to be found in prose. Thus, the tone of the utterence is controlled and varied by the varying pattern of rhythm. Read it aloud, friends, to see and hear  what I mean! Good work, Krissy!. Thanks for posting.

Patrick Talty

[This message has been edited by pjtalty (04-08-2003 10:25 PM).]

Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
30 posted 2003-04-09 06:47 PM


Krissy,

I am so very glad that this made the
book! Your mom showed it to me when
you first wrote it. she was so proud
and rightfully so! your writing has
steadily improved over time, and now
I must say you are such a brilliant
writer! this is so gorgeous, one of
your best to date!
take care.
amy

"love is like a butterfly--
if you chase it,
it will surely fly away,instead
hold it close and watch it grow into
something beautiful"
~me~

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