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Open Poetry #24
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Wasteland
| Open Poetry #24 |
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Wasteland |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn 
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Exiled in the Hinterlands For the sins of the father She builds her lean-tos Beside streams flowing Nowhere Lost and abandoned She drums out her secrets Into the night And hears, only echoes Untrusting and aloof She now pounds her laundry Upon uncaring stones Wandering alone From camp to camp Warming herself With prurient fires When she visited my own I watched the flicker of flame Dance her face, both Cherub and Whore As her eyes followed The spiraling sparks I could see within them An abysmal depth Holding exquisite sadness Then, cloaked once again In her brocaded doubt She slipped away Back into the Wasteland Where, I'll see her tracks And traces And hear her plaintive Wails As she goes about Beating the bulrushes In search of her Deliverer [This message has been edited by wranx (01-20-2003 05:20 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 E.F.Rose - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
ED! She'll smile, once she gets here. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
wranx--you captured her! Much enjoyed! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
*keeping this in me mothy library* giving you these in return...      I was reborn on the shores of the Chesapeake Bay |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
OH I love this!! And JM's pics are a perfect compliment.. Exactly how I pictured her. May we have more please? Perhaps a series? ~Hugs & Smiles~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
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regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
I thoroughly enjoyed this. Wonderful depiction. Many good phrases and lines. I like: "...cloaked once again in her brocaded doubt".... Thanks, Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
You already know I love this. It's a haunting verse, m'yeti. Absolutely gorgeous  |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
nicely done...very nicely done indeed. enjoyed this ed...and find more in it each time I read |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486 |
Beautiful..... Miss you... H |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
When she visited my own I watched the flicker of flame Dance her face, both Cherub and Whore Another tale that satisfies and at the same time leaves me saying, and... |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Duncan stole my phrase of choice (*pout*) but the whole telling was amazing as only you are sweets... missed this---and you") ~D Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
An apt Native American feel to this, Ed. Some great images, too. Cor |
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Connel
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736Florida, USA |
Very good poem.. Enjoyed the read. Thanks for sharing. I wish to become a great poet some day, but it will only come in time. Til then, I shall write my poems, and wait. |
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garysgirl 
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Ed, once again, you have told quite a story with your words. Very beautiful one, too.  "Love makes the world go around" |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Loved the trail of smoke this leaves, and the warmth that settles around the camp. Almost reads like a controlled bonfire! Only you wranx, can tell it the way you do. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I love this. This is quite a personality profile...love the stark constrast of metaphor here: She now pounds her laundry Upon uncaring stones Wandering alone (I know..but loved the way that verse married the next...) and then? Then, cloaked once again In her brocaded doubt-- gotta love this. It fits like a smoking jacket of delusion. Can't ya just see the gold thread? *smile* c'mere and hug me baby.  |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
You write heart among the harrowed darkness. |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
cloaked once again In her brocaded doubt I, too enjoyed this decription... I don't believe writing is just a passing thing foryou. *s M |
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jade dragoness Member
since 2003-01-25
Posts 76 |
she slips into the future with the past in her backpack waiting for the right time, the right place, to release old memories into the winds of forever |
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