»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #24
»
Serenity 2
| Open Poetry #24 |
|
Serenity 2 |
|
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla 
|
Serenity 2 Dabs and dips of silver strips Paste the moon on lover’s lips And shadows prance a soft surround Where bodies lay upon the ground. And butterflies in nightly flight Glide the wind within their sight Dancing magic leaves in trees Shining silver in the breeze And echoes play a rhapsody A melody of tenderly And veils of wonder form in dew As crystal frail comes into view A fantasy, a lover’s moon Played upon the grasses loom Webbing in a magic kiss The ebbing of a soul in bliss Swimming in a pool of glass Phantoms on a bed of grass |
||
| © Copyright 2003 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
The last two lines tie this present up beautifully, Sy... thank you for my cup o'tea... |
||
|
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Oh such a dreamlike quality with this write Sy. Makes me want to snuggle back into my warm bed. Wonderful morning read. ~Morning hugs~ ~Time has cast a spell on you, |
||
|
regards2you Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940California |
Sy, This one is beautiful indeed....the rhythm is foot tapping perfect! Read the first two lines outloud, whoa...I don't need Janet this time to point out the finer aspects of your talent. I honesty enjoyed this greatly! actually, read the entire poem outloud...nice! Thank you, warm regards, Pat  ..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.. "Desiderata" [This message has been edited by regards2you (01-11-2003 08:53 AM).] |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sunshine You welcome dear.  Enchantress Thanks for the hugs. Pat, You just made my day. |
||
Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Heck, it isn't a cup of tea, it is more like a whirlpool massage and a glass of some vintage wine...Ahhhhhhh!!!! |
||
Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Seymour - as graceful and peaceful as the snowflakes falling outside my window. Have a wonderful weekend dear poet. hugs, Chris "Hope" is the thing with feathers- |
||
garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Mr. Seymour...... YES, you are all they said above, plus more...... indescribable, you are, Sir....  Oh yeah, you are good with my capuccino, too.....  "Love makes the world go around" |
||
|
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
I could visualize our serenity dancing in this, twirling and chanting. Very nice rhythm! |
||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Now now...you KNOW the rule sy...anything with Serenity in the title is MINE.  smiling...so I snatch this beauty along with kisses.This is better than valium, it's so soothing.... yummy yummmy yummmmmmmm..... |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Magnus All of that and heaven too. Chris, And the same to you my dear Chris. garysgirl Thank you dear. Midnitesun A lovely reply. serenity, Too much yummy will spoil the tummy. LOL |
||
|
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Dabs and dips of silver strips Paste the moon on lover's lips ================================= And butterflies in nightly flight Glide the wind within their sight Dancing magic leaves in trees Shining silver in the breeze ======================================= And veils of wonder form in dew As crystal frail comes into view A fantasy, a lover's moon Played upon the grasses loom ================================ Swimming in a pool of glass Phantoms on a bed of grass ================================= my oh my....hows a moth supposed to pick a favorite line from all these glorious rhymes divine...Stinky once again you send us to school and teach us the poetic golden rules. The imagery in this is sooooo lovely and classic Sy-babes poetry...the personifications of nature's beauty coupled with your cadence leaves me sated and giddy.  Serenity and sanctuary defined in your couplets of sublime. Dabs and dips of silver strips Paste the moon on lover's lips And veils of wonder form in dew As crystal frail comes into view could those couplet be any cooler??? "me thinks not" says the moth *ww*  It's over long before her fall from grace, she's never been this far from safe. |
||
|
Rainbowdust Member
since 2002-12-05
Posts 320Sydney, Australia |
Absolutely wonderful! You took my breath away with each word. The soul would have no rainbows, had the eyes no tears. |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
JM, Now I know you are well. Thank you Tink for the wonderful accolades. You made my day. I'll double sadle Randy and we'll have some tea tonight. WWSRainbowdust You are too kind. Thank you. |
||
|
Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big hugggssssssss) Oh Seymour, this is lovely, sweet friend, your words are always so enchanting and speak of such that special serenity! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Seymour, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..." Shakira [This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (01-11-2003 06:02 PM).] |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Noah, Thank you for the read and reply. |
||
|
gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA |
Ah seymour, you so often amaze me. this one again flowed with such grace. love ya sy. learning each day, for you and i, our paths have met, i've already learnt that you are love. |
||
|
bluRaven Junior Member
since 2003-01-08
Posts 18Richmond, VA |
Can not really top the words that have already been said, so I leave once simple word instead.... I remain speachless. "~Sometimes you have to forgive someone because you want them in your life."~~ |
||
|
Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Seymour - you write some beautiful poetry, you sure do... BC |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
gemjop Thanks and love you too. bluRaven LOL Thank you. Bill, All I can say is thank you. |
||
|
angelfriend Member
since 2003-01-11
Posts 52Michigan USA |
Wonderful poem. I agree with everyone. Such a remarkable way you see things! Very imaginative and eloquent. |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
angelfriend Thank you for the eloquent. |
||
|
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Silkie...James |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
James, Thanks for the silkie. |
||
|
winston Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 204NW of Eden |
The first and second quatrains are brilliant, and it seems that the third and fourth somehow lose the impetus that is in the first and the second. The couplets do redeem it, but not entirely. Thanks. "am a tourist not a terrorist, don't shoot, cause we are all on a journey to God" Michak |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
winston Thank you my friend I will try harder next time. |
||
|
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
This one makes you want to dance with butterflies, Sweet Sy...  |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Nan Then would you dance with me? |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
