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Open Poetry #24
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Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a

0 posted 2003-01-07 10:04 AM


Balladeer lost all his hair,
Complained his hair just wasn't there.
He styled it daily with his comb,
Then fertilized with Miracle Grow.

Then when Winter came to pass,
He grew a head of fine green grass,
In certain places, (just a few)
Dandelions grew there too.

A bird flew bye and as a joke,
Dropped an acorn from an oak.
Then a sprig soon appeared,
With roots protruding from his ears.

His doctor said, "If I can,
I'll try to come up with a plan.
I think that it would be much wiser,
To stay away from fertilizer."

"Just as roots will plug up drains,
They also tend to clog up brains,
I know this plumber with a tool,
Who will roto-rooter-thru on you."

The plumber then began to drill,
Told Balladeer to hold quite still,
With this whirling-rotor thing,
He rootered out the roots that clinged.

The operation though successful,
The prognosis was regretful,
Balladeer was not much wiser,
His brain was still just fertilizer.

[This message has been edited by Toerag (01-07-2003 11:14 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2003-01-07 10:07 AM


ROTFLMAO.
You are evil, yanno?
A veritable Brain Drain master.

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
2 posted 2003-01-07 10:36 AM


too, too funny...but then we all know that both of you have brain and wit that equals 2

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
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Gaia
3 posted 2003-01-07 10:40 AM


LOL, is that on a scale of 1-10?
regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
4 posted 2003-01-07 10:44 AM





Smiling here.....

Thanks for a grin.

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
5 posted 2003-01-07 10:44 AM


ROFLMAO!!!! I love this, sweets!!! Thanks for the laughter... this day certainly needs it! *S*

I was thinking as I read the doc's advice to stay away from fertilizer that it was a lost cause... when one's full of it, it's tough to avoid! LOL

This is one to read again and again... with a grin every time!!!

Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

6 posted 2003-01-07 11:08 AM


(chuckling) Toe... I do believe you have planted the seeds for a retort from Deer, soon as he gets his ears cleaned out good and can find one to "borrow"
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2003-01-07 11:14 AM


Toe,
Ya know, awe forget it. I think you put time in on this one. LOL

Salty
Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669
Texas
8 posted 2003-01-07 02:01 PM


Kind of makes you think twice about rubbing your fingers through his hair     doesn't it?   OOOOHWEEEEE
garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
9 posted 2003-01-07 02:16 PM


Mr. Toe, is this a nice way of saying that Mr. Ball-deer is "full of it"???

HaHa!!....

Nice to see you back, friend. Where ya been?? We've
all missed you here....

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~  
                  

Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
10 posted 2003-01-07 10:46 PM


From fertile minds great things sprout -- that's what you were actually tryin to say Buzz?

[This message has been edited by Local Rebel (01-07-2003 10:47 PM).]

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
11 posted 2003-01-07 10:54 PM


Gawd!  How on earth do you come up with these??!
YOU are too much!
~Hugs to ya!~

~Time has cast a spell on you,
  So you won't ever forget me~

Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
12 posted 2003-01-08 02:12 AM


LOL... Excellent story! Can we say that was some fine home grown chit man... Yes, I think we can.  Thanks for the laugh.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
13 posted 2003-01-08 02:41 AM


oh my...me thinks this one hurt my tummy
Charisma
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since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
14 posted 2003-01-08 07:01 AM


oh my......you are awesome, thanks for the smile

its always fun to read you and Balladeer


((hugs))
Charisma


Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
15 posted 2003-01-08 07:52 AM


Midnitesun...I thought about something like "liquid dummer" or possibly "brain-no" but couldn't work it in correctly...

VAS...brain and wit that equals two?..thanks..that's a compliment..LOL

regards....thanks dear..

suthern...I was thinking about making the last verse something like:
The operation though successful
The prognosis was regretful
Though is wasn't quite a cure
His brain was still manure.

Cpat...yea, I know, I always reap what I sow, or sew or so, or seaux or whatever, I reap it.

Seymore...has it ever looked like I've put a lot of time in any of my garbage?

Salty..Lice and ants and things.heavens no.

garysgirl..thanks gal...I've been hither and yon...don't visit too much anymore

Rebel...how da'hell ya been boy?....

Enchantress....It's easy when ya have "fecies" for brains...things just pop out

Andy....yea....and Balladeer has papers.

Passing Shadows....can I kiss it for ya?

Charisma...Thanks for the sweet comments

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
16 posted 2003-01-08 12:37 PM


Well, here we are - 2003
It's time to start the year.
Here's Toerag up to tricks again
Insulting Mr. 'Deer.

You'd think the way he's suffered
With abrasions and contusions
Would make him leaving me alone
A New Year's resolution.

But he's as onery as he was
So here we go again.
It's time to skewer the skunk once more
With movements of my pen.


Hey, retard! Somebuddy must have given you some smart pills for Christmas 'cause you came up with some good lines in this one....and I can think of no one more qualified to write about fertilizer!

Nice job, bum!

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
17 posted 2003-01-08 02:07 PM


The only "movements" you have are not from your pen,
I think they are from your brain,
Which is at the other end!!!

But I can't wait?.....
Happy New Year Mr. Deer...

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
18 posted 2003-01-09 02:45 PM


ROFL... I love that last verse that almost was. *G*

Somehow, I knew this would get you promises of retaliation. *G* suthern settles down with her popcorn and prepares to watch the show. *G*

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