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Open Poetry #24
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jjote
Senior Member
since 2002-12-25
Posts 1088
Ontario, Canada

0 posted 2003-01-02 06:45 AM


(I peeked at the Poetry Workshop and they were doing iambic pentameter. I'm trying to write one here, hoping it's done right. Somebody, please tell me??)

I pray each night as I lay down to sleep
that I find peace in dreams devoid of strife,
My soul may travel far in worlds unknown,
or find a path that leads to darkened woods.
If in the morn I wake up fresh as dew,
for this new day that I am still alive,
for this new year unfolding like a bud,
I thank our God this miracle He grants.

I wish for all a Happy New Year, too!
May kindness, peace and love be yours to have.

[This message has been edited by jjote (01-02-2003 06:47 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Josefina Costales - All Rights Reserved
Nan
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
1 posted 2003-01-02 08:09 AM


December was Blank Verse month - That's unrhymed iambic pentameter.  This lovely piece fits the bill perfectly.  You meter is flawless...

Happy New Year to you as well...

kaile
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Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
2 posted 2003-01-02 08:15 AM


My soul may travel far in worlds unknown,

hi jjote, that sounds like a wonderful new year resolution to have...i'll bring this line along with me through the year of 2003...

jjote
Senior Member
since 2002-12-25
Posts 1088
Ontario, Canada
3 posted 2003-01-02 05:52 PM


Thanks Nan & Kaile. You'll inspire me to write more..(oh no, not again!-someone may groan..)
Sandpiper
Senior Member
since 2002-06-15
Posts 738
land of flora and fauna
4 posted 2003-01-03 04:16 AM


well done!! Happy New Year!

"And it was at that age...Poetry arrived in search of me...And something started in my soul."
Pablo Neruda

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-01-03 04:41 AM


not sure what it is you were trying to do with iambic pentameter? or whatever it is...but it sure is a good write
kaile
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since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
6 posted 2003-01-04 12:31 PM


well, i'm not groaning
garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
7 posted 2003-01-04 12:51 PM


Josefina, I'm like Dixie (passing shadows), I have no idea what kind of poem you were attempting to write. All I know is that I like it. I like the thoughts and the way you wrote each line with ten syllables.
I've thought of going to the "Poetry Workshop",
but have hesitated because I don't think I know enough
about poetry To even go there.

Thank you for sharing with us.  

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~  
                  

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