some sorta' hallmark card [acoustic#6]

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christian
Member

since 2002-12-18

Posts 331

0 posted 2002-12-31 02:50 AM

some sorta' hallmark card [acoustic #6]
---------------------------------------

i stumbled upon an old fairytale ..
caught you,
inside a chilly september morning ..
in the corner
sipping on latte,
with those green-brown eyes
set on the lamp post across the street--
there, like some sorta' hallmark card ..

rubbed my eyes, just in case
[is that you?]
yeah ..yeah ..
your hair got so long--
youre so pretty.
warming the room like a 5:00am sunrise
but it's still too cold in here ..
and the distance between,
though just a smile away--
seems further than forever.

i miss you.

i walked over, with my hands hidden inside
cold pockets and the next thing you know,
they put on that one song ..
that one song we danced to at prom,
remember? stood there,
sorta' like a daytime up soap opera
or one of those sappy movie cliches ..

you turned--looked at me,
with those eyes,
i was a thirsty December
and you
you were raining like May ..
i think i fell in love all over again.
complicated,
kinda' like a set of Tori Amos lyrics.

i miss you.

and we talked about las vegas
and college transfers.
letting go, and making plans to
catch up over 99 cent cheeseburgers
or maybe chinese food.
ripping corners off napkin edges
and it's such a crazy world, you know
maybe a jerry springer ephisode, sorta'

i stumbled upon an old fairytale ..
caught you,
inside a chilly september morning ..
in the corner
sipping on latte,
with those green-brown eyes
set on the lamp post across the street--
there, like some sorta' hallmark card,

and i miss you.

------------------------------------------------
"and i dont want the world to see me
because i don't think that theyd
understand,
when everythings meant to be broken
i just want you to know"

[goo goo dolls]
------------------------------------------------

[This message has been edited by christian (12-31-2002 02:53 AM).]

GG
Member Elite

since 2002-12-03

Posts 3532
Lost in thought

1 posted 2002-12-31 06:43 AM

I really like this!
Each time I read your stuff I feel like I'm reading the lyrics from some great band. I really enjoy your writing.

Keep it up.
Happy New Year!
Always, Alyssa

- And so it was that time stood still -
(blink, breathe, stand, fight)

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2002-12-31 06:59 AM

Hello Christian. I do like the way you write. My only problem is this thing about spelling...I'm a fanatic for proper spelling...so that when I see misspelled words, the magic of the poem gets lost in the irritation of thinking "if they had only corrected that..."

and you should see what I do to MYSELF if a misspelled word slips by....

I'm not fit to live with!

Good read....thank you!

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2003-01-31 10:29 AM

...i stumbled upon an old fairytale ..
caught you,
inside a chilly september morning ..
in the corner
sipping on latte,
with those green-brown eyes
set on the lamp post across the street--
there, like some sorta' hallmark card...

an honest look
inside a heart gone missing.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

4 posted 2003-01-31 11:01 AM

"you turned--looked at me,
with those eyes,
i was a thirsty December
and you
you were raining like May ..
i think i fell in love all over again."

Excellent...love the imagery here.
~Hugs & Smiles, Nancy~

~Time has cast a spell on you,
So you won't ever forget me~

christian
Member

since 2002-12-18

Posts 331

5 posted 2003-01-31 12:04 PM

hey! thanks for the feedback.

i'm usually pretty keen on getting the
spelling right. but this was intended
as a song and i wanted the dialect in.

:muah:

-chris.

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

6 posted 2003-01-31 12:07 PM

Chris--

Fresh and natural walk through your heart. I liked it!

Ada'doLisdo'ti
Member

since 2002-12-10

Posts 123
California

7 posted 2003-01-31 12:12 PM

Nice I can see the situation and feeling as if I where watching it.

Of all I've lost; I miss my innocence the most.

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

8 posted 2003-01-31 12:56 PM

(smiles) Bravo!!! You know, this did actually remind me of a Tori Amos song, her new hit "A Sorta Fairytale"! (big hugggssssss) What I love most about her music is her keen talent in using sensory images fluently to portray her melancholy thoughts and feelings, like "Cornflake Girl". This is wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Christian, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

9 posted 2003-01-31 01:00 PM

makes me wonder if you're someone I know

I'm always loving your writings!

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