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Open Poetry #24
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jytree
Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 336
omaha ark usa

0 posted 2002-12-27 02:46 AM



For all of us facing time,
I've put together this little ryme,
So I hope you like this ryme of mine,
This poem is about passing time,

We stand with our backs to the wind,
Looking at out very end,
We take step Or do we walk away,
Do we have the courage To look and turn away,

Do we barge foward not caring of what lies ahead,
Or do we stand our ground with the unmistakeable look of dread,
Many of us watch the clocks,
Wondering when our hand it going to stop,

Some press on some run in fear,
But no matter what you do the eand is very near

For all of us passing time,
I really hoped you will injoy this ryme,
Now until we meet in the end,
I remain always humbly your friend

© Copyright 2002 Michael Jay vaughn - All Rights Reserved
christian
Member
since 2002-12-18
Posts 331

1 posted 2002-12-27 04:16 AM



nice message. basic rhymes, but it could
always be worse. what's with the capitals
in the middle of the lines? it's
distracting, but .. i liked it. like i
said, gave out a good message. keep it up.

-chris.

Midnitesun
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Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
2 posted 2002-12-27 01:13 PM


Happy New Year! The annual ritual of watching the clock is upon us. Enjoyed this timely piece.
garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
3 posted 2002-12-27 01:48 PM


I liked the "rhyme of the time".    

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~  
                  

jytree
Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 336
omaha ark usa
4 posted 2002-12-27 02:02 PM


well thanks for all that liked it I guess I just want it to look snapy so I tried to put it captol
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2002-12-28 12:53 PM


I enjoyed this rhyme
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