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Open Poetry #24
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Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2002-12-20 12:02 PM



High desert sage
Holds the remnants of snow
Blown against the roots
So tenaciously seeking life
In this craggy landscape
Of broken rock
And hardpack

But the sky
Is unbroken blue
That when touched with eyes
Is so cold it freezes my soul
Into six sided flakes
Of memorized
Befores

And I am left
To drift on winter’s wind
Remembering summer
And you

© Copyright 2002 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
1 posted 2002-12-20 12:16 PM


Ron,

Ah, those warm memories. I liked this  a great deal. Your descriptive lines of desert put me there. Of course, the last lines.....perfect! (evidently the ~you~ after summer, not being part of the frozen soul memory) That's my take and I like it!


Warm regards, Pat


..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

[This message has been edited by regards2you (12-20-2002 12:24 PM).]

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
2 posted 2002-12-20 12:19 PM



That was so beautiful--and wistful...

~ Blowing a soft summer wind your way

warm hugs,
EA

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
3 posted 2002-12-20 12:32 PM


i often wonder if the winter really does magnify the melancholy....i liked the longing
expressed

jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

4 posted 2002-12-20 12:47 PM


I think pat got it perfect.....well in the commenting dept, you got an A+ in the writing dept....
I live in the desert, sometimes I am the desert....so yes this speaks to my soul
thank you for the posting of this

Salty
Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669
Texas
5 posted 2002-12-20 01:39 PM


This kind of makes me think of the words in that song...."but, ohhh, Those S u m m e r Nights" (well, I didn't say I was a singer)

Anyway I did enjoy those warm thoughts of yours ..... A very nice way of thawing

~Salty

In the Midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.
--Deepak Chop

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2002-12-20 02:11 PM


Ron

Hopefully your summer memory will keep you warm, but just in case...break out the gloves and jacket and here's a to help keep you warm.  

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
7 posted 2002-12-20 02:21 PM


I'd be willing to bet that number three button never gets pushed on your apology machine. LOL

Beautiful write. *S*

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2002-12-20 03:01 PM


But the sky
Is unbroken blue
That when touched with eyes
Is so cold it freezes my soul
Into six sided flakes
Of memorized
Befores

================================

frigid never felt so succinctly cold.
imagery,perfected,  
impact(like the Titanic iceberg)
impressive, always.....
very cool write poet sir(no pun intended) LOL

Will the wind remember the names it has blown in the past?
With this crutch, its old age and wisdom, it whispers no ... this will be the last.

jh

RSWells
Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533

9 posted 2002-12-20 03:08 PM


In dryer times it's tumbling tumbleweeds. Enjoyed
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
10 posted 2002-12-20 03:39 PM


God! I love endings that just leave you sitting there in a daze, to think about stuff.
Auguste
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Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
11 posted 2002-12-20 04:37 PM


"But the sky
Is unbroken blue
That when touched with eyes
Is so cold it freezes my soul
Into six sided flakes
Of memorized
Befores"

I gotta tell ya, I LOVE that stanza.  Excellent imagery, sir.

The stars will shine when I am gone,
the earth will turn on as before,
the gulls, still race along the shore,
the morning star, still kiss the dawn

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
12 posted 2002-12-20 05:14 PM


Those old summer memories keep us going and keep us warm, too, don't they??  

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~  
                  

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
13 posted 2002-12-20 06:35 PM



Beautiful but tinged with longing. I enjoyed it.

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
14 posted 2002-12-20 06:55 PM


"And I am left
To drift on winter’s wind
Remembering summer
And you"


*sigh*

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
15 posted 2002-12-20 07:04 PM


Always with the longing, longing.

It refrains like a chorus.

Cor

Miah
Senior Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 1062
Pennsylvania
16 posted 2002-12-20 07:20 PM


Lovely, warm memories can heat the soul on cold days like these.
Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
17 posted 2002-12-21 03:50 AM




(big hugggsssssss) Oh Ron, I hope now the sun shines radiantly upon you and the wistfulness has withered into the west horizon, sweet friend, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
18 posted 2002-12-21 03:57 AM



Ron~
Oh...this is gorgeous.
These lines...

   "But the sky
    Is unbroken blue
    That when touched with eyes
    Is so cold it freezes my soul
    Into six sided flakes
    Of memorized
    Befores"

Just perfect...absolutely beautiful.
I just LOVE this piece.
Hugs,
~Vicky

Sandpiper
Senior Member
since 2002-06-15
Posts 738
land of flora and fauna
19 posted 2002-12-21 07:29 AM


one of those reads I wish I had written..cold memories and a still-warm heart--"pen"point accuracy!!

"And it was at that age...Poetry arrived in search of me...And something started in my soul."
Pablo Neruda

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
20 posted 2002-12-21 08:07 AM


....six sided flakes
Of memorized
Befores

Yes!

A Tone of Voice
Member
since 2001-07-18
Posts 287

21 posted 2002-12-22 01:09 PM


it seems you have a quite a following and I can certainly understand why, this was hmmmmmm, dreamy~!


And I am left
To drift on winter’s wind
Remembering summer
And you

that part really got to me, wonderfully romantic~!

Atov~


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
22 posted 2002-12-23 04:49 AM


I dunno guys, but this one just gets me for a second and third time, keep reading over and over...just awesome!
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

23 posted 2002-12-23 01:36 PM


Snow and sand,
scrub and bone.

I almost emitted a loud, sliding whistle in awe and appreciation for this piece.

(I knew I shouldn't have swallowed a whistle last night )

Mikey

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
24 posted 2002-12-23 01:42 PM


Cpat Hair
Excellent write, enjoyed.

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