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Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

0 posted 2002-12-20 06:10 AM

The sky in weeping
releases tears from above
life revitalized.

Nature offering
divine sips from heavens cup.
The earth mother drinks.

I know that you can 'read' me
but can you 'hear' "me"?

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

1 posted 2002-12-20 06:13 AM

(smiles) Awwwwwwwww, this is soooooooo beautiful, sweet friend, this is angelic, and may all of Mother Earth be purified in blessings from Him! (kiss on cheek) This is lovely, sweet friend, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Donna, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

***P.S: I love your ideas on our poem, I'll send mine this afternoon, yay!

***

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

regards2you
Member Elite

since 2002-10-01

Posts 3940
California

2 posted 2002-12-20 06:17 AM

Donna,

This is wonderful.

"Divine sips from heaven's cup"

whoa, I love that...! Enjoyed a great deal.

Hugs, Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
"Desiderata"

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

3 posted 2002-12-20 06:17 AM

Noah sweetie thank you. GOOD MORNING!

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

4 posted 2002-12-20 06:19 AM

GOOD MORNING Pat! I am glad you enjoyed that line cuz I sat here and rewrote that one at least ten times to try to get the right feel for it. I muchly appreciate that!

SmartChick
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-09-23

Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown

5 posted 2002-12-20 06:38 AM

This is wonderful, Donna. I love it.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

6 posted 2002-12-20 07:19 AM

"I sat here and rewrote that one at least ten times"

who said practice
doesn't make a good poet?

Enjoyed these very much, little one...

winston
Member

since 2002-12-19

Posts 204
NW of Eden

7 posted 2002-12-20 07:30 AM

OK Gentle Spirit
You don't want
sugar coating
and you dont want
any changing
that changes your meaning. :-))

Well, you know the last two lines, there seem to be bit vague because of a typo. Do you mean to say "can't 'read' me", or do mean to say "can't 'hear' me"? I think one them is meant to be "can't" and not "can". Hope that helps.

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

8 posted 2002-12-20 07:44 AM

Thank you all. Winston, the last two lines are not part of the Haikus. They are my signature line. They are correctly printed the way I want them to be. Thank you for taking the time to leave your critique.

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-19

Posts 7392
Ohio

9 posted 2002-12-20 10:25 AM

isnt the rain wonderful? i loved your poem

winston
Member

since 2002-12-19

Posts 204
NW of Eden

10 posted 2002-12-20 01:43 PM

Well, whaddya know! I musta read as part of the poem. Am sorry. Hey, still, I enjoyed this short poem.

christian
Member

since 2002-12-18

Posts 331

11 posted 2002-12-20 01:51 PM

clever haikus. the first one was
particularly in its imagery. cool.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

12 posted 2002-12-20 03:16 PM

Donna, this wonderful little poem is certainly my cup of tea!

~ warm hugs,
Linda

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

13 posted 2002-12-20 03:37 PM

nice way to put it Donna. Makes me want to cry.

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