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Open Poetry #24
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maninthebox
New Member
since 2002-12-19
Posts 1


0 posted 2002-12-19 10:48 PM


I spun a round
came around
I spun too much
I fell down


I watched the world
as it passed
spinning by
very fast


I watched the colors
shift and change
with my eyes as
picture frames


As the world came to a stall
stopping when I took the fall
slowing down
I started crawl
stopping from my spin too fast
coming back to the reel world
at last
at last


[This message has been edited by maninthebox (12-19-2002 11:05 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 maninthebox - All Rights Reserved
Salty
Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669
Texas
1 posted 2002-12-19 10:59 PM


WHoa!       Now this was Dizzy!!!!


You can edit that first part that didn't center....although it does kind of add to the dizziness.


Welcome among the Bold and italics ...Passions with a smile


~Salty

In the Midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.
--Deepak Chop

Salty
Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669
Texas
2 posted 2002-12-19 11:05 PM


WEll I just now saw where this was originally posted and now I have.... the rest of the story.


Just wanted to tell you I reread it and I like the way you put reel in for real. Don't know if you realized it, but it works well.

Also i really like that name of yours maninthebox....TOO COOL


~Salty

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
3 posted 2002-12-19 11:06 PM


I see the apple doesn't fall far....!

That's one family with an abundance of talent....excellent!

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2002-12-19 11:18 PM


It is indeed a great honor for me to welcome you to Passions in Poetry. I feel as if I know you already. I hope you continue to write - your first entry here is excellent. I have a feeling you'll be an asset to our home in no time.

It's also my pleasure to tell you to check your email for a special greeting.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2002-12-19 11:22 PM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS!
I know you will love it here.
I much enjoyed your first post..
and I'll be looking for more of your work.
~Hugs, Nancy~

~ Season's Greetings to my 'family' at Passions ~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

6 posted 2002-12-20 12:04 PM


smile...

Welcome, maninthebox.

I too, loved the reel vs. real choice that you made here.

Are you by any chance interested in filmmaking? grin?

(okay, I'l shaddup, blew yer cover already anyhow. SO PROUD of you...eyes as picture frames..yanno I loved that--even if it does scare me a bit.)





and hey, did I ONCE lick a hankie to clean your face? NEVER!!!

(gawd I love this poet)

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
7 posted 2002-12-20 12:49 PM


You had me spinning and twirling in this. Welcome!
  

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2002-12-20 03:25 AM


yep, good write. Welcome to Passions!
Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
9 posted 2002-12-20 03:36 AM




(smiles) Every now and then you just have to let yourself spin and blend the colors and see what you get! (smiles) This is a gorgeous and vibrant debut, sweet friend, I LOVE IT!!! Welcome to Passions, sweet friend, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

10 posted 2002-12-20 10:24 AM


yes...I see the talent runs in the family..
should I talk to you like I do your Mom and infuriate you with goads to write what's deep
inside? Or should you and I gang up on her and make life interesting for her by tag teaming?

Welcome to the blue... hope to see more of your words here.


Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
11 posted 2002-12-20 10:30 AM


maninthebox
Welcome and enjoyed your post.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
12 posted 2002-12-20 10:33 AM



Welcome to Passions, MITB...it's going to be a pleasure watching your poetry in motion...

Please!  Check your E-mail for a Special Greeting!

Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
13 posted 2002-12-20 12:16 PM


I've had bar-room departures like this....liked the write...good original poem....
brian sites
Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475
usa
14 posted 2002-12-20 12:31 PM


shamanic spin-art

dizzy reel too real

picture-eyed cameradance

the world is your paint
the word is your brush

keep the music coming, Maninthebox

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
15 posted 2002-12-20 12:57 PM


I enjoyed this very much... Welcome to Passions! *S*
jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

16 posted 2002-12-20 01:02 PM


gonna ditto suthern.....*grin* she loves it when I do.....
no really welcome, from your aunt Karon...oh, you didn't know your mom had another sister with the same name? lol
Love your mom and enjoy her poetry, will watch for more from you as well

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
17 posted 2002-12-20 01:10 PM



maninthebox~ (cool name )
I really enjoyed this poem.
Reminds me a bit of one that I wrote awhile back.
It's clear that you have a natural talent for
writing and I'll definitely be looking for more from you.
Welcome to Passions!
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

christian
Member
since 2002-12-18
Posts 331

18 posted 2002-12-20 02:09 PM



from a new member to another, here is my advice to you:

don't be too honest
around these pages.

welcome.

-chris.

[This message has been edited by christian (12-20-2002 02:10 PM).]

Auguste
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
19 posted 2002-12-20 02:17 PM


man in the box, loved your first post, though it made me a bit more dizzy than I usually am.   Welcome to Passions!

The stars will shine when I am gone,
the earth will turn on as before,
the gulls, still race along the shore,
the morning star, still kiss the dawn

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
20 posted 2002-12-21 01:45 PM




A word of advice from an oldtimer to a newcomer;
listen to your mom. She is a very, very smart lady and knows how things spin in this place.

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