navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #23 » How the pity rises
Open Poetry #23
Post A Reply Post New Topic How the pity rises Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Michael G
Senior Member
since 2000-06-25
Posts 579
Nashville

0 posted 2002-12-06 03:39 PM


in the event that I shall fall
floundering in my sorrow
you could grace me with your tears
flowing over my last sin.
its a slight after affect
of the word play paridise
I have found my self in
tatterd remains of a life lost.

© Copyright 2002 Michael G - All Rights Reserved
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

1 posted 2002-12-06 03:41 PM


some nice word play in this..and a read to make one pause...

enjoyed

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2002-12-06 04:13 PM


in the event that I shall fall
floundering in my sorrow
you could grace me with your tears
flowing over my last sin.

========================
bittersweet beauty!!!!
where have you been boyeeeeeeeee

just one line ... one rhyme ... one metered verse ...
if only I could inspire in you ... promised poetic coerce.

Michael G
Senior Member
since 2000-06-25
Posts 579
Nashville
3 posted 2002-12-06 09:25 PM


thankyou the two of you, and jm to be answerd in an upcoming post
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #23 » How the pity rises

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary