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Open Poetry #23
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Cassie
Junior Member
since 2002-11-12
Posts 32


0 posted 2002-12-04 08:16 PM


You mean the world to me
If you can only see
That my love is deeper then the sea

You are my everything
I feel as if I can tell you anything

You are my sunshine on a rainy day
When the sky gets gray
You make me feel that everything is okay

You are my all
Together we will never fall

You make me feel warm inside
You I do confide
And my love will never subside

You give me pride
And changed me inside

With you by my side
I know you will provide



© Copyright 2002 Cassie - All Rights Reserved
Ice_Queen
Junior Member
since 2002-12-04
Posts 29
Delaware, USA
1 posted 2002-12-04 08:22 PM


While I appreciate the efforts behind this poem, I gotta say I think the rhymes are...overused, and alot of the phrases have become...cliche.  Sorry for being harsh.  Some advice, from someone who used to be the same way, and still is occasionally...Buy a Thesaurus, and stay away from pop music.
Cassie
Junior Member
since 2002-11-12
Posts 32

2 posted 2002-12-04 08:27 PM


I am just expressing my true and honest feelings.  And you shouldn't assume.  I don't listen to pop.  Thanks for being honest.
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