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Open Poetry #23
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Wind
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since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981


0 posted 2002-11-24 07:42 PM



Wide eyes of blackness,
see everything inside
the weather is cold,
her skin as pale as ice
is she real?, we can't decide
you see her reflection,
standing there, alone
when you break the mirror,
then she is gone.

blacker than night,
inside is full of woe,
she could be a mirroge,
or just the mirror's foe,
is she real, is she a fake,
she scares us, this we know,
but sometimes we will follow her,
and no one's yet said no

Sometimes I give myself the chills. I get scared, and put it on paper.

Never be normal!

© Copyright 2002 Liz - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2002-11-24 07:49 PM



You write of things that are mirage
and fears come tumbling, a barrage
of unknowns and chilling feel,
you write them well, you make them real...

~*~

You're going to go a long way, young lady.  Keep writing.

regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
2 posted 2002-11-24 07:50 PM




I think you are very talented. I like the way you wrote this and you captured the way many of us feel sometimes. It is very good.

Warm regards, Pat  

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Wind
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since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

3 posted 2002-11-24 07:54 PM


thank you, I might write a sequal to this, If I feel like it sometime....

Never be normal!

Salty
Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669
Texas
4 posted 2002-11-25 12:54 PM


Your words bring a chilling effect. I don't think you meant you were staring yourself in the mirror, but it sure made me think of this.  That is because I have looked in the mirror and questioned who I was ....at times.

A very creative write ....disturbing and curious as the wind can be. *S*

Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
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Portland, Oregon
5 posted 2002-11-25 12:58 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Oh Liz, this is wonderful, sweet friend, I too usually don't like to write this style at all but write honestly what comes to my mind and I too have the grunge style in me! (sigh) May all your fears forever be chased away with hope, sweet friend, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Liz, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Earth Angel
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since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
6 posted 2002-11-25 01:03 PM



Wind, you blew onto the world stage with your poetry and have blown us all away with, not only your incredible talent as a writer, but with the fascinating machinations of such a young mind!

Earth Angel

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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #23 » something, we don't know (I usualy don't write like this at all)

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