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Open Poetry #23
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Munda
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since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands

0 posted 2002-11-18 09:02 AM



Song of Death - Terza Rima

Bereft of love my life lies on your shore,
Enticed by waves that sing a song of grief:
"With me you'll find tranquillity and more."

Enslaved by rage, in search of Death's relief,
I hear my requiem escape the tide;
Salvation at long last the sea's motif.

Embraced by salty arms I shall abide,
- While whispers in the wind prelude descent -
And sink into oblivion to hide.

To me this is a gift from Heaven sent,
- My zest for living scattered on your beach -
And silence reaches out from firmament...

But suddenly I hear a seagull screech:
"Come fly with me... come here and soar alive...
Come spread your mighty wings," her call's beseech.

"You have within the strength for your survive,
Break out this trance imposed on you by Death,
Awakened by the call of life's revive."

"You, eerie might with velvet voice of Death,
It's not your Song but life that I adore!
You can't deprive me of my final breath!"

Munda

© Copyright 2002 Munda - All Rights Reserved
Lady In White
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1 posted 2002-11-18 10:22 AM



Munda, you have met the challenge of Terza Rima very well, and you, m'lady, should take a bow.  Well done, very well done.

regards2you
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since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
2 posted 2002-11-18 10:56 AM



Munda, Thank you for this Terza Rima.
I had wondered how one would ~sound~.
I enjoy the rhyming scheme, and had you not pointed it out, I think I would have noticed, though usually I am more into content. This reads so well, in both respects.  

For content, I especially like the last few lines a great deal.

Thank you so much for your effort and sharing it with us. It is wonderful, in more ways than one.

Warm Regards,
Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Mistletoe Angel
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3 posted 2002-11-18 11:21 AM




(smiles) Oh Munda, this is gorgeous, sweet friend, yes, always embrace life and never think about death and just accept it when it does come around! (big hugggsssss) God Bless You, sweet friend, this is wonderful, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Munda, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

majnu
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since 2002-10-13
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SF Bay Area
4 posted 2002-11-18 01:26 PM


you hit form dead on! its an intersting metaphor you use, full of ocean imagery. nice.

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
5 posted 2002-11-18 01:35 PM


Victory over despair by hope unlooked for. I'm at a loss for words but brilliant and beautiful are the most fitting that come to mind.
Madame Chipmunk
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since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
6 posted 2002-11-19 12:44 PM


This gives me the chills, Munda...
Beautifully written
~ loving chipmunk hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
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7 posted 2002-11-19 02:18 AM


Munda, your talent shouts out in this poem. It is very well-written. I enjoy your work.
Thanks for sharing with us.

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~
                  

DawnG
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8 posted 2002-11-19 01:19 PM


Munda,

This is beautiful. Thanks for sharing.

                          Dawn

Gentle Spirit
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since 2000-10-09
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9 posted 2002-11-19 02:34 PM


This is beautiful.  You have mastered it completly.  well done.
Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
10 posted 2002-11-20 10:57 AM


Thanks you all very kindly for taking the time to read and reply. It's highly appreciated.
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