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Open Poetry #23
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Living Longer
| Open Poetry #23 |
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Living Longer |
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ecrivan Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923my own state 
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Wonder if a longer life is an answer when so many suffer at living shorter ones take in a deep breath before a final sigh it was good that life by golly how it went so fast. life past eighty when the mind is chipper tenacious grasps onto threads of continuity those DNA spirals still perform their duties but the lack of tissue repair exceeds the rate of cellular death now superceeds down the life's cobbled path Dorothy's troupe went in search of courage,a brain and heart wonder if a longer life would have made a dent so many suffer for the lack of basic qualities common in places of well fed, nutured kids. by golly how life races ahead of invention periods peel away like dead skin one innovation becomes obsolete after the next t'was a good life for what I thought it would bring how rampant its wheels turn after futile nuturing. yet a spirit of longevity gets the better of me am aware that a longer life is no answer to population explosions or shortness of breath would that I could hold on for eternity take in a deep breath before a final sigh and exit stage right with a standing ovation. [This message has been edited by ecrivan (11-12-2002 05:10 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2002 Martin Dansky - All Rights Reserved | |||
DawnG 
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
Ericvan, Wow! This is a very deep poem. A lot of good points to be said here. I enjoyed this a lot.  Dawn |
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majnu
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088SF Bay Area |
a simple thematic peice that was quite pleasurable to read. i can't put a finger on it but your works consistently flow very well. sp: j'aime votre nom mon bon ami!  -majnu |
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ecrivan Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923my own state |
Hello, I don't think that this piece is as exceptional as you make it out to be but do realize that the subject matter is definitely rich and that the style is somewhat narrative |
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