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Open Poetry #23
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Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2002-11-08 11:00 AM



Crushed glass eyes
And bitter tongued taste
Of yesterdays coffee
                   After 4hours sleep
                     Doesn’t lead to sweet words
                       Flowing in an easy dream
                         Of line across a page

Even the simple
Challenges my will
                  To contain this day
                           Under sheets

Still it is rise and run
                    Soak the synapses in caffeine
That like a stale donut
                    drink it in and make
Palatable

what is day old


There was love once
       but
        Now even the words
         I so long adored
          are cruel  pages of
           my own inadequate

image

        And the world is reduced
         To the sour taste of too
           Long held in your mouth
            Explanations
curdling on
  bleary eyed visions
   Of now

© Copyright 2002 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
1 posted 2002-11-08 11:03 AM


Awesome poem

Cold hands means a warm heart

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2002-11-08 11:13 AM


Whoa....me thinks me moth eyes just walked on glass...sharred, jagged, yet still reflecting colors and light.....

hey you ... so nice to have you in poet port Cpat...let me pour you a fresh cup of java..
or perhaps some of me raspberry tea?
tis good for what ails ye  

No one has ever shown me how to see the world the way I see it now ...
and I never saw blue like that before.

~Tom Kimmel~

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
3 posted 2002-11-08 11:16 AM


"And the world is reduced
         To the sour taste of too
           Long held in your mouth
            Explanations
curdling on
  bleary eyed visions
   Of now"

intense emotions expressed here.....

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2002-11-08 11:16 AM


Ron

The view from the sleep deprieved hurts even love.  The stark feel of this is very real, but then your poetry always is. I hope you can get more sleep soon, my friend.  Hugs!  

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
5 posted 2002-11-08 11:18 AM



You work far too hard.
Take the next two days off
and write a poem on Monday.


jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

6 posted 2002-11-08 11:49 AM


sound like we are having the same sort of day.......*smile* but the way you write it almost hurts to read....I know those caffeine days....no...I am having one of those caffiene days....sigh....really nice write..
MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
7 posted 2002-11-08 11:50 AM


...kind of like The Matrix in loop mode...

-MVS

"AS ABOVE SO BELOW"

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
8 posted 2002-11-08 12:13 PM


Ron, it sounds like you're working really hard. Listen to Sunshine and take a few days off, if possible. Then, grace us with more of your fine poetry on these pages.

"Love makes the world go around"
~~with love and hugs from Ethel~~
                  

regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
9 posted 2002-11-08 12:19 PM



It has always been as difficult or more so, for me, to accept my own inadequate judgement of others, as it has been accepting those who failed my ~perfect~ expectations of them.....

If only life ~was~ a fairy tale....

There is always a sequel, and withdrawing love would surely cause some to take a harder look at their closed-mouthed, no, open-mouthed attitudes (?)......
or, might that just be their fears, unspoken for lack of trust, or of not finding that perfection in return?

And fear can get mighty rank when not exposed to laughter and love.

I love this poem. It reminds me of so many people, past and present, myself included.

Some of your poems? I simply cannot help but put them right on, for they fit so perfectly... there's that word again! I'll slide out of this one...
and go see if I can find any others that cause me to feel and think so much.

Enjoyed this a great deal!

Thank you for sharing your talent,

Warm regards,
Pat  

    


..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

[This message has been edited by regards2you (11-08-2002 12:48 PM).]

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
10 posted 2002-11-08 12:31 PM


There was love once
       but
        Now even the words
         I so long adored
          are cruel  pages of
           my own inadequate


you can surely make one stop and think about their own life with your expressive words...I am feeling too good to dwell in the negative today.. will wait to be inspired, as I usually am, for a more positive poem...and hey..we all have days like that..sometimes weeks or longer.

how about a hug or two, will that help?

M

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
11 posted 2002-11-08 09:40 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Oh Ron, I hope all is going alright, I send angel hugs out to you and too hope you take a small rest then come back fresh again as you are so deserving of that comfortable break! (sigh) This is sincerely heartfelt, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Ron, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

reluctantlyme
Junior Member
since 2002-10-28
Posts 34

12 posted 2002-11-08 10:40 PM


Still it is rise and run
                    Soak the synapses in caffeine
That like a stale donut
                    drink it in and make
Palatable

what is day old


There was love once
       but
        Now even the words
         I so long adored
          are cruel  pages of
           my own inadequate

image


A fatique that sleep can not remedy, unless wrapped in loves lost embrace.
If I were a poet, this is the level of expression and almost incidental intensity I would strive for.  Most impressive.

  

No matter how good looking she is... someone, somewhere is glad she's gone.
---Davey's helmet

dougsbird21
Member
since 2002-11-08
Posts 52
London(from TX though)
13 posted 2002-11-08 10:44 PM


Nice one! I like structure-it makes poems more alive
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
14 posted 2002-11-09 12:51 PM


"And the world is reduced
         To the sour taste of too
           Long held in your mouth
            Explanations
curdling on
  bleary eyed visions
   Of now"

How is it that you make this cup of bitterness palatable?

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
15 posted 2002-11-09 05:44 AM


The coffee seems a trifle bitter, perhaps a new blend, my friend.

Ed

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
16 posted 2002-11-09 08:39 AM


Nice to see you writing, my friend
Good Stuff, of course
Cup o' fresh brew?

Connel
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-11-04
Posts 736
Florida, USA
17 posted 2002-11-09 08:42 AM


Lovely words. Thank you so much for sharing this poem. I really enjoyed the read.

I wish to become a great poet some day, but it will only come in time. Til then, I shall write my poems, and wait.

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