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Open Poetry #23
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Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

0 posted 2002-10-30 04:06 PM


I owe this line to quake who used it to close a poem I use it as an opener. "What language do you use to keep me undefined." I hope it doesn't breach copywrite I asked permission.

What language do you use
to keep me undefined
and shadowed
in the half world that
we call obsession?
It is not the language of love.
I have known from you
sweet words of nothing;

Do not play your romantic Romeo part,
it does not become you
your language ties me in knots
and keeps the restless mind within me
forever chained to the shadows
where the demons of my past dwell
and my desire overcomes my sensibility

Do not disarm me
with your sweetmeats
that are coated in the language
of saccharine
fake sweetness
that poison my will,
with corrupt pleasure
and leave the bitter aftertaste
of passion on my tongue

Do not beguile me
with the paper lantern
promises, that speak
of warmth and light
while offering nothing more
than pretence
and destruction in the dark
while the bridges of my past
are burned in effigy
on the wings of
darkest desire
and I succumb
to the hollow
words that capture my soul
once more

Do not pin me in the
tapestry of night
where my fluttering wings
beg silently for release
before they bow
broken before you,
mute forevermore

I am caught in the silken web
of destruction
of my own making
as I give power over to you

When you spoke
I heard what I dreamed
and now my dreams
have all turned to
nightmare dust
as I dwell in the shadows
of impermanence
and faded futility
insubstantial
in the light
that your language
entraps me to.

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



© Copyright 2002 Lynne Dale - All Rights Reserved
regards2you
Member Elite
since 2002-10-01
Posts 3940
California
1 posted 2002-10-30 09:35 PM


Kethry,  ~WOW~ .... you are an amazing poet. This is remarkable. Actually, I am speechless.


Warm Regards,
Pat

..without surrender, be on good terms with all persons..
        "Desiderata"

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

2 posted 2002-10-30 10:37 PM


Wow! Kethry, this is fantastic! Very well done!
bslicker
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-04
Posts 2321
state of mind
3 posted 2002-10-31 02:31 AM


Great write
Bernie

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
4 posted 2002-10-31 02:38 AM


Kethry, this is a very warm and heartfelt poem. There were a lot of emotions within it. Thanks for sharing.

Love To All,
Ethel

Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
5 posted 2002-10-31 10:09 AM


Keth beloved heart what do I say in response to this, nothing for you leave me speechless with envy, blown away by the power and the majesty of your words. Now tell me that you doubt your skill as a writer, now tell me that this is simply something you jotted down in a quiet moment. You cannot expect me to believe that this gem of wonder was not crafted carefully, the words placed within it carefully and precisely. Because beloved heart this is incredible writing, and I love it utterly, it isn’t beautiful, except in its construction, it is sadness and pain written with the pen of a craftsman, or in your case woman. Excellent language usage, the flow utterly perfect and YOU know that I love it.

Absolutely wonderful darling heart


Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

Breathe through the heat of our desire
Thy coolness and they balm
Let sense be dumb let flesh retire
Speak through the earthquake wind and fire

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
6 posted 2002-10-31 11:09 AM


I do believe this to be one of your best, Kethry

I love it and can relate to much of it.
hugss
M

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
7 posted 2002-10-31 11:46 AM


Many a woman has been sweet-talked into believing what they want to believe to be true. You wrote of this so incredibly well, and you can wager that there will be many who read this, who will be able to identify with your words.

Another good write!

Linda

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
8 posted 2002-10-31 01:42 PM


This is simply stunning, Keth... I have to agree it's one of your best. And I seem to be doing that a lot lately... could you please share some of that amazing talent! LOL

We know people like this... we're swept away by sweet words whispered so easily... and we only hear the falseness in echoes as they walk away.

I was truly held spellbound! *S*

Krissy
Senior Member
since 2002-02-22
Posts 556
kent England
9 posted 2002-11-01 05:59 PM


Keth excellent writing it is stunning and very wonderful indeed. This poem is really one of your best. .You never fail to write well and this is outstanding. Beautiful work.
Very well written


love and warm stuff
as always
Krissy

And while thy willing soul transpiers
at every pore with instant fires
Andrew Marvell 1621-1678

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
10 posted 2002-11-01 07:33 PM


Aye...me thinks this now tops the list of my favorites...of your many wonderful writes my friend....and of my numerous favorites it shares the top....(seems there are so many I cannot pick a single one as TOP DOG...only TOP DOGs...

jwesley

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

11 posted 2002-11-01 08:21 PM


Do not beguile me
with the paper lantern
promises, that speak
of warmth and light
while offering nothing more
than pretence
and destruction in the dark
while the bridges of my past
are burned in effigy
on the wings of
darkest desire
and I succumb
to the hollow
words that capture my soul
once more

Do not pin me in the
tapestry of night
where my fluttering wings
beg silently for release
before they bow
broken before you,
mute forevermore
==============================

I see you are taking your free verse to new heights Keth-girlie ..this is a very cool write of theme and metaphor...you carried both out to poetic perfection with clever use of vocabulary, turn of phrase and  powerful imagery.
Well done..take your bows Poetess Keth
mothyme

Unknown to us, there are moments when crevices open for time to come alive with begining.

John O'Donohue
Conamara Blues

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
12 posted 2002-11-01 08:28 PM


Awesome good write, Kethry. Lots of sweet honeyed phrases that will be safe in my favorites file.
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
13 posted 2002-11-01 08:37 PM


The only power others have over us is what we give them. Brilliant writing here, Keth. If you can recognize the signs, then you know what to do about it.
Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
14 posted 2002-11-02 09:24 PM


Broken shards of reason
crushed beneath my flying feet,
turned to dust,
blown by the swift wind
of my departure
into drifting
nightmare shapes.
I don't need you.
Why do I want you?
How can this end-
without you?

Sorry, Keth, you make me write things.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
15 posted 2002-11-02 09:42 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Oh Kethry, this is so well-written, sweet friend, so many can relate to the poignancy your words display and of what truly is sweet or not! (sigh) This is excellent, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Kethry, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
16 posted 2002-11-02 10:54 PM


This is remarkable, Keth...
The truth spoken so poetically
~ loving chipmunk hugs

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
17 posted 2002-11-03 06:36 AM


regards2you, thank you so much for the wow. Whenever I write I worry that my words will not reach out to people. It seems you prove me wrong everytime.

Denise, thanks for the fantastic. When you respond as you do it helps me to see that perhaps I have some small talent and I am not just whistling down the wind.

Bernie, thank you for the praise

garysgirl, Thank you free verse is not my forte but I dabble sometimes when I have a thought that can't be contained any other way.

Er... Mushy it was jotted down in a moment when I read this other fabulous poem. Howver I did tighten it up on a different site. This is the original without changes and very cliched.

nakdthoughts,
thank you so much, coming from one who excels in free verse (you) it warms my heart to think this piece has touched you in some way.

Earth Angel,
you are right and many more will. Thank you for seeing beyond the words

suthern,
I don't know that it is  as much talent as a fortunate falling of words on the paper...and they make such a pretty pattern


Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
18 posted 2002-11-03 06:38 AM


Krissy, if you like it I am blessed indeed, thank you for showing me the joy in free verse.

jwesley,
thank you for the email address, you are now firmly locked in my address book and you will never be free of me. Thank you also for your wonderfully warm words, it's people like you who give people like me the incentive to continue writing.

JM,
why is it when you quote my words back to me they take on a magic that only a true poetess can give, there is wonder in your writing, so I am pleased to have come to your notice.

Midnitesun
isn't it always the way to hear honeyed phrases that are cloyingly sweet and leave an aftertase of something else

Balladeer, You are right as usual and yet so often what we know has no effect whatsoever on what we do.

Pilgrimage,
you finished my thought....perfectly, thank you

Noah, in the sweet sweepstakes -you win hands down. Thank you once again for your constant presence in response to my work.


Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
19 posted 2002-11-03 06:40 AM


Lyra,
I could never thank you enough for your friendship and your encouragement, but I am going to try. Thank you lovely lady.
Keth

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



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