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Open Poetry #23

The rewrite

bslicker

Member Elite

since 2000-12-04

Posts 2321
state of mind

0 posted 2002-10-29 09:06 PM

The rewrite

One that
allowed me
to write
what thoughts
meaning
to others
to decide
the mind
of the pen
facing the thoughts
for others
to hope
until forgotten
within time
than once again
words flow upon
the pages
then the projection
begins again.

Bernie

Thanks Serenity!!!

[This message has been edited by bslicker (10-29-2002 09:12 PM).]

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

1 posted 2002-10-29 09:16 PM

nicely done...thank Serenity for me too, if it was she that influenced you *s
M

bslicker

Member Elite

since 2000-12-04

Posts 2321
state of mind

2 posted 2002-10-29 09:31 PM

nakdthoughts
thanks and yep from earlier form where everything rhyme'd to just letting my thoughts go. So yes Serenity influenced me to change...

here was the first one
/pip/Forum47/HTML/001870.html

and oh man did she help me with this to change my ways......

Thanks again Serenity....

Bernie

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

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