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Open Poetry #23
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Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California

0 posted 2002-10-22 11:46 PM



The House that Jack Built

There were so many gates
to lock out the lust
that longed for wealth,
some were strong and opened
if you knew the code,
others were green and made of hedges
that curled around or climbed
the view of pewter sky
and red tile roof.

And across the slated walkway
the cathedral doors opened
to polished wood and Berber
and art of mossy water
and lavender plants
and ripples of clever distortion.

A parrot waddled across the marble floor
and directed a song into all the open space,
its yellow eyes like tiny marbles,
its tale of crimson
a living art with color that matched
the Imari collection
standing in a row atop the
the rare antique of living
that held its throne against the walls
of every room
and sank barefoot into the plush.

I saw the mantle now covered
with enormous cement fish
that came to life
amidst the drift wood and glass balls
and then turned to see the reflection
in warm wood of family lined smiling
on the credenza of my wonder.

So I came back to my cluttered computer
and my carpet of warn memories
and sank into the difference
thinking some sort of envy,
a tiny piece of longing,
but then looked at the piano of my youth,
covered with the faces of my life
glassed and covered with a past minute
and a smile played the ivory keys.
___________
a repost from 10-00

© Copyright 2002 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Christopher
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Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
1 posted 2002-10-22 11:57 PM


Just look at the last stanza - That's my favorite out of this wonderfully vivid metaphor. It not only has soome amazing lines, but ties up the subject with a soft bang over the head. Really, really liked this Martie - makes one pass over the "stuff 'n' things" and look more to the "possesions" they hold inside their heart and memories.

Well done!

Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
2 posted 2002-10-22 11:59 PM




(smiles) Yay!!! Oh my gosh, this is such gorgeous and vivid imagery, sweet friend, I could iagine marble walls and fountains and purple flowers all over the rooms, yay, I am delighted you re-posted this as all your poems flood with blossoms, I love it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Martie, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
3 posted 2002-10-23 12:00 PM


So I came back to my cluttered computer
and my carpet of warn memories
and sank into the difference
thinking some sort of envy,
a tiny piece of longing,
but then looked at the piano of my youth,
covered with the faces of my life
glassed and covered with a past minute
and a smile played the ivory keys.

This is so special... so very Martie... I can't figure out another way to describe it but it really reads like the essence of your poetic mind...
~ loving hugs from Michigan

Lyra

copyright2002 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Gemini
Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203
Wisconsin, USA
4 posted 2002-10-23 12:10 PM


Martie this is exqusite. I admire your talent. Right now I'm reflecting of my own evenings accomplishments; a sink full of tonights dinner dishes facing me, yet content in knowing I helped my 12 yr. old son tonight with some very difficult homework assignments.  Ours is not the Taj Mahal either, but the memories are and someday will be priceless.
majnu
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088
SF Bay Area
5 posted 2002-10-23 12:52 PM


beautiful. i'll show my parents this if they ever try and sell the house i grew up in!

its not the things themselves, but the memories each triggers. atta way for pointing out what matters.

btw GEMINI: the Taj is a tomb built by Shah Jaha for his beloved Queen, Mumtaz - who still rests there.

Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

6 posted 2002-10-23 08:52 AM


as always..you capture so much more than the images painted in words.. you dear lady are a true poet...and a talent..
Larry C
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Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
7 posted 2002-10-23 11:50 AM


Martie,
I think this is the best of your writing that I have read. Well worthy of many reposts. So many metaphors to ponder. A keeper on which I may reflect over and over. Stunning. Thanks.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
8 posted 2002-10-23 11:57 AM


Sweet Martie...
I'm with Larry on this one.  There is so much here..and the more one reads...the more one finds..you have exquisitely inserted images for our minds to find and ponder..beautiful write dear poetess.
~Hugs~

~ Time has cast a spell on you
  So you won't ever forget me ~

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
9 posted 2002-10-23 05:15 PM


"So I came back to my cluttered computer
and my carpet of warn memories
and sank into the difference
thinking some sort of envy,
a tiny piece of longing,
but then looked at the piano of my youth,
covered with the faces of my life
glassed and covered with a past minute
and a smile played the ivory keys."

I only hightlighted the last stanza for the warmth that it gave me upon reading it, I believe that everyone who reads it is smiling too. Beautiful words, Martie.

The ladders of life that we scale merrily Move mysteriously around So that when you think you're climbing up, man In fact you're climbing down-Nick ca

Soleil Noir
Senior Member
since 2001-12-19
Posts 688
USA
10 posted 2002-10-23 05:25 PM



One woman's priceless art
is another woman's family...

smiling with you...

suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
11 posted 2002-10-23 05:25 PM


That last verse is sheer magic. *S* This is beautiful, Martie... As others have said before me (and better *S*)... it touches the chord within us that recognizes true worth. *S*
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
12 posted 2002-10-23 05:34 PM


Martie,
The magic of your brush strokes just sweeps me away.

garysgirl
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Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
13 posted 2002-10-23 05:35 PM


Martie, this is such a beautiful picture of words you have painted, dear lady. But, like the others replied, the most beautiful of your "painted words" were the last ones....when you came back to "reality", and conveyed the riches of your own memories. These are the "priceless" things in life....family and friends. Thanks, again, for sharing your heart, sweet friend.


Love To All,
Ethel

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
14 posted 2002-10-23 08:15 PM


Martie - dear poetess, this poem is like a favourite painting that one wishes they could fade into. Wonderful. Chris

Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away.

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
15 posted 2002-10-23 10:07 PM


MARTIE!!!!

Did it again....yep, you did....awesome
metaphors... Do you play the PIEAnnie....??


Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
16 posted 2002-10-23 10:12 PM


Martie - you are just amazing with your writing....

BC

WhileIWasGone
Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486

17 posted 2002-10-24 02:33 AM


Beautiful as always ...

H.

Goodknight
Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386
Ohio, USA
18 posted 2002-10-24 07:18 PM


Martie - this is stunning as are you - you write images and metaphors with such talent - I am in awe as I read - over and over again with each of your offerings - loved this a lot - Paul
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