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Open Poetry #23
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

0 posted 2002-10-19 11:17 PM



She Was the Moonlight Sonata

harbored undulations refused
to surface, until
first notes

played,   s  l  o  w

building a deluge, as recall
jettisoned hard,
spraying former times in
varied tones and hues,
sounds splashing
in echoes of autumn leaves

the climb upscale of
Adagio, adulated, as loss of dreams
held dear, first movements being
all she had
on the paths taken

not until months after grieving
should have been
well grounded
but yet to begin, that sharing started

between a left-over daughter, hearing
the left-behind sister still struggling to
deal with their loss

aunt and niece, now sharing, eldest having
privileged truths as
livid acceptance of pending
extinction, the sister/mother having
vented Venetianed rays onto all past
wrongs which held court
still, hardened beyond recognition,
more bitter for having never
shown before

even as dust motes sparkled

now patiently, aunt
painting a diverse picture
of the personal connection
linking blood to blood

placing enigmatic shadows
into sunlit compassion
niece/daughter
sensing then, the deeper demise
of having never known
to ask her own
mother

of the dreams she had once had

understanding more
why some things
had been uniquely important

sensitivity now illuminated

as reflected through
inherited eyes of
her mother,

the why of, when she had sat
before her upright
grand, slender fingers dipping
onto creamy ivories,
having coveted the First Movement
as if it had belonged to
her

the sadness
the single flower between dark
abysses
outraged anger at past losses

now, she identified that
clarity which her mother
had emoted, having become
Beethoven’s despair
so well

for she had,
over time, transformed into
the First Movement

a revelation that
deafened the distance
but
defined the left-over
daughter’s resilience



[This message has been edited by Sunshine (10-19-2002 11:36 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved
Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
1 posted 2002-10-20 09:28 AM


I loved this last section
"a revelation that
deafened the distance
but
defined the left-over
daughter?s resilience"
it is just stunning.

Kethry

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2002-10-20 09:38 AM


the why of, when she had sat
before her upright
grand, slender fingers dipping
onto creamy ivories,
having coveted the First Movement
as if it had belonged to
her
--------------------------------------------
Beautiful imagery here Karilea...
I love the above stanza...
This is truly an amazing write.
~Hugs~

~ Time has cast a spell on you
  So you won't ever forget me ~

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
3 posted 2002-10-20 09:48 AM


Karilea - my goodness...I am at a loss for words...nope..wait...Beautiful !! hugs, Chris

Life is not measured by breaths you take, but by moments that take your breath away.

scorpio
Member Ascendant
since 2002-10-02
Posts 5178
right...there
4 posted 2002-10-20 10:42 AM


Powerful emotions here....they washed over me
...I was immersed in the deluge...experienced the pain of loss...but found the acceptance in resilience.


...believe what your heart feels...

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

5 posted 2002-10-20 10:45 AM


Again your imagery leaves the reader in awe Karilea.  Enjoyed much hon.

If I have touched one heart through my words, then I have acheived my dream...

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
6 posted 2002-10-20 12:59 PM


"for she had,
over time, transformed into
the First Movement

a revelation that
deafened the distance
but
defined the left-over
daughter’s resilience"




(big hugggssssssss) Oh my gosh, this is just superb, sweet friend, it is amazing how bridges can literally build bridges between us all in spirit and make the distance nothing more than a fjord. (sigh) This is wonderful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Karilea, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton



"Underneath your clothes there's an endless story..."

Shakira

[This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (10-20-2002 01:00 PM).]

Ivy Rose
Senior Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 1300
MA, USA
7 posted 2002-10-20 01:34 PM


Stunning imagery and heart-wrenching emotion woven into the poetics of this poem. A long line of masterful strokes making this poem incomparably beautiful in its power. ***Ivy Rose

[This message has been edited by Ivy Rose (10-20-2002 01:35 PM).]

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2002-10-21 07:36 PM


Oh my!  Intense and beautiful composition, Karilea.
Robert Adamson
Member
since 2002-10-21
Posts 328
PA/USA
9 posted 2002-10-21 08:32 PM


I am always glad to read something about music. I gleen a little more wisdom with each reading. Thank you.

etoodog

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
10 posted 2002-10-21 10:48 PM


"building a deluge, as recall
jettisoned hard,
spraying former times in
varied tones and hues,
sounds splashing
in echoes of autumn leaves"


someday, I will write like this

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
11 posted 2002-10-23 04:43 AM


Very nice...the poem and the music...James
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

12 posted 2002-10-23 08:44 AM


you always impress and amaze...even if I do not stop and say so as often as you deserve
NewEnglandlazurlu
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470
A Mountain Paradise
13 posted 2002-10-23 09:24 AM


Karilea, this is a brilliant piece of writing.
I tried to pull out a section to highlight, but each stanza was better than the last.

Hugs, Marti

Larry C
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
14 posted 2002-10-23 11:46 AM


Karilea,
When I was 13 I memorized the Moonlight Sonata. It seems that it is still inside of me as I feel the emotions of this piece. Incredible in its intensity of loss, regret, true desire and growth.

Maybe Susan will write like this some day. But this seems far beyond my abilities. Such a deep keeper. Thank you sweet friend.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

15 posted 2002-10-23 12:33 PM


I can see the light
gracing the water
in ripples.

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
16 posted 2002-10-23 12:40 PM


Karilea, this is an absolutely  BEAUTIFUL  piece of work. I'm so glad that it got bumped back to the top page, so that I didn't miss it. I love your work so much, sweet Karilea. You always paint such beautiful pictures and make such sweet music with your words. Thanks so much for sharing your special talents with us.


Love To All,
Ethel
(thanks for the birthday greetings)

[This message has been edited by garysgirl (10-23-2002 12:42 PM).]

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