Toerag moved to Carolina, way up in the hills
To get away from those collectors waving unpaid bills
But hillfolk don't warm easily to strangers in their town
And, for six months he never had one neighbor come around.

    

He was sitting in his living room one day, pickin' his nose.
(he did that every day and boogers covered most his clothes)
When, suddenly, he heard loud knocking coming from his door,
A sound that, for his whole time there, he hadn't heard before.

    

He jumped up quickly, brushed his hair and hurried for the door
To see a mammoth of a man, two sixty - six feet four.
The words he said in southern drawl filled Toerag with delight..
"Yore invited to a party at my place on Friday night."

    

"Oh boy!", thought Toerag. "Finally I've been accepted here!"
"Sounds good to me", said Toe, .."and if you want I'll bring the beer!"
No one had even said hello in all his time spent there
And he would have a reason to finally change his underwear.

    

"I gotta tell ya", big man said. "Sometimes we drink a lot."
"No problem", answered Toerag. "I'll drink anything you got."
"I gotta tell ya", big man said. "Sometimes we like to fight."
"I've been around", said Toerag. "In a fight I'll do alright."

"I gotta tell ya", big man said. " A lotta sex goes on".
"Sounds great!" said Toe. "Been sitting here for six months all alone."
"What should I wear?", said Toe. "I dress up or just jeans and tee?"
"Don't matter none", the big man said. "It's only you and me."