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Teen Poetry #6
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Jaime
Registered
Member
Posts 250


0 posted 2003-08-28 11:37 PM


Rusty words, ground and
packed away. Away. But they
caught pieces of me
The skin too deep
for hands to receive

White socks stained, and I said,
Everything turns under this sky
Somehow I remain

Here

Somehow I remain

And don’t pretend that its
for me, yellow only needed
blue to make green so don’t
try to pretend

The divers, they were good
before they died out. They died
submerged inside of me and
the residue sticks to my identity

‘cause I remember everything

and I don’t think its that
important. But my socks are
still stained and the corpses
are still inside of me

and somehow
you thought it would be

funny

082803


the faeries creep into my hair at night leaving it in terrible knots

© Copyright 2003 Jaime - All Rights Reserved
Obsolete
Junior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 43

1 posted 2003-08-29 12:58 PM


Intense.
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

2 posted 2003-08-29 03:00 AM


Jeez I love reading you Jaime.

Keeping this

Maree

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)


gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
3 posted 2003-08-30 07:41 AM


what maree said.



Instant karma's gonna get you.

Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
4 posted 2003-08-30 03:07 PM


oh my god. I love how you write. The last line hit me hard. The whole atomsphere of this poem is amazing. wow...

Kandi
Member
since 2000-06-14
Posts 354
North of Hell
5 posted 2003-09-16 12:13 PM


Wow...very impressive. Going in my library.
~Kay

Just wanna be funny,looks like the joke's on me.
So call me Captain Backfire.

peachesNcream
Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears
6 posted 2003-09-16 04:57 PM


As Obsolete said...Intense. I believe they're right! Great work, this was an awesome poem! ~Jess

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go." -Herman Hesse

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx
7 posted 2003-09-16 07:35 PM


Hey Jaime, nice write.  Its been awhile since Ive been in this forum {except the other day}, so Im glad I got to read this.

GIS

a trickle of music from a well
let it spill and roar like hell!

{Lord knows Im a VOODOO CHILD}-JIMI

BabieDoll
Member
since 2003-02-13
Posts 268
BFE
8 posted 2003-09-19 05:35 PM


This poem blew me away...so full of immense feeling. I loved every bit of it!

~J.Lynn

**To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.**

gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
9 posted 2003-09-19 07:54 PM


where are you gal? get back n write some more please?

Instant karma's gonna get you.

Jaime
Registered
Member
Posts 250

10 posted 2003-09-20 01:05 AM


I just posted one the other day... "To Be". I've been so busy lately I haven't been able to keep up with posting and replying.

the faeries creep into my hair at night leaving it in terrible knots

AlostHeart
Member
since 2003-05-01
Posts 78
Wisconsin, U.S.
11 posted 2003-09-30 10:21 AM


Very intese good write!

Is it just me but aren't we terrorists as well.Going over seas just to aise some hell.

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