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Teen Poetry #6

Mourning Becomes Eclectic

freudian_slip
New Member

since 2003-06-20

Posts 7
collective soul of humanity

0 posted 2003-07-24 02:38 AM

I dreamt of you last night
tasting of moonlight pooled
on silk robes of twilight
over stardust you rule

adorning me with galaxies
you whispered of tainted secrets
with each nebulous fallacy
your lies tempting me to forget

shimmering illusions of kisses
moments entombed under azure sky
I may only yearn to reminisce
as morning can't help but love decry

(I weep at the painted rays of dawn
tears stain the roses I lie upon)

Match
Member

since 2002-07-01

Posts 286
Canada Edmonton

1 posted 2003-07-24 02:54 AM

I enjoyed this just making this short as I am off to bed soon.

-ash

I'm just kickin it up

teenpoet
Member

since 2001-10-17

Posts 280
Michigan

2 posted 2003-07-24 10:47 AM

You have absolutely beautiful imagery. It's positively beautiful. And I love your words. And the poem. It's a great poem. Love the words.

Man, do I sound nuts. Don't worry, I am.

The future isn't now, that was yesterday.

dertah
Senior Member

since 2003-06-18

Posts 584

3 posted 2003-07-24 01:31 PM

good ooonnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeee!

Silent Evincar
Member

since 2003-07-22

Posts 179
Here There and Places Between

4 posted 2003-07-25 01:14 AM

Wow.... is there any more words for this piece? Well maybe but I'm still too awestruck. Question... how do you make those words so smooth when entering someones mind? Amazing. I want to see more.

NJS

Rise of Truth
Member

since 2003-07-12

Posts 59
Beneath the Fury Sun

5 posted 2003-07-25 01:25 PM

Good use of vocab. It didn't suffocate the piece.

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