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Teen Poetry #6
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tapper798
Member
since 2003-07-20
Posts 353
My own world

0 posted 2003-07-23 05:51 PM


No, i am not one of those crazed teenaged girls who will do anything and everything to get a guy.  I wrote this about how you feel when you are completly and utterly in  love with someone.

I would do anything...
to be in your arms,
to know you were there,
to keep me out of harm.

I would do anything...
to look into your eeys,
to see into your sould,
to see them sparkle like night sky.

I would do anything...
to kiss your lips,
send a shiver down my spine
and wade in the wonderful bliss.

I would do anything...
to know you were here for me,
to know you always were,
to know you would always be.

I would do anything...
to know you loved me, too,
to feel that warmth in your heart,
like i will always do.

I would do anything...
to let you know,
let you know my secret
so i could let my feelings show.

Tell me what you think.

© Copyright 2003 Erin - All Rights Reserved
AngelShell
Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...
1 posted 2003-07-23 06:39 PM


I liked it.
It was a very sweet and honest way of saying how you felt.

Nice job.

~I haven't memorized all of the cute things to say but I'm working on it~

dertah
Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584

2 posted 2003-07-24 01:11 AM


good oooonnnnnneeeeeee!  
Silent Evincar
Member
since 2003-07-22
Posts 179
Here There and Places Between
3 posted 2003-07-25 02:07 AM


You know sometimes you wish that one girl would just get all wishy washy like that. Well maybe I'm just one of those guys... hoo hum. Anywho very nice and I got the point.


                    NJS

peachesNcream
Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears
4 posted 2003-07-25 01:03 PM


Nice write. I felt it the whole way through, I feel the same you do. ~Jess

"At the touch of love, everything becomes a poem." -Plato

Star T
Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 182
Philadelphia, US
5 posted 2003-07-25 01:23 PM


OOOOOH THAT'S GOOD! SO SWEET IT IS.MADE ME MISS MY BOYFRIEND OH SO MUCH!
WinterWren
Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044
...Coming to
6 posted 2003-07-25 07:34 PM


*sigh* I can relate to every line.
Very good job of putting your feeling into words. Beautiful poem.
Well done.

WinterWren
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
7 posted 2003-07-26 10:52 PM


I think that I like it, and I can somewhat relate. I liked the part about I would do anything if I could kiss your lips..yeah that part. thanks for sharing. I could feel the love.
~Lex

[This message has been edited by Lexy (07-26-2003 10:52 PM).]

Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
8 posted 2003-07-26 11:51 PM


reminds me of what i just did, the last stanza did. this was a great piece of writing....good work


riley

*the bloody tide comes in on the shore, time after time*

tapper798
Member
since 2003-07-20
Posts 353
My own world
9 posted 2003-07-30 05:37 PM


Thank you for your replies! I really appriciate it!

To the world, you're one person;
to one person, you're the world.
   *~Erin~*

Song_for_Serenity
Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 97
USA
10 posted 2003-07-30 10:44 PM


Great poem. The flow was a little off in some places, but I loved it anyways. I could really feel this. Anyhoo, have a spiffy day!

~Angela
"Anything less than mad, passionate love is wasting your time...Life has too many mediocre things in it, love shouldn't be one of them..."

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