Teen Poetry #6 |
those dreams |
dertah Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584 |
i love those dreams when you come to me when you know im scared so you kiss me chills roll up my spine i shiver in your arms in a daze i fall seduced by your charm i wish what it seems is what it would be but sometimes this dream only brings misery |
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© Copyright 2003 dertah - All Rights Reserved | |||
SumdayUwillAcheLikeIache Junior Member
since 2003-06-01
Posts 10 |
i get doze dreams |
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Alnilam Member
since 2003-07-04
Posts 75 |
well written! loved it. thanks for the great read. ~*Alnilam*~ |
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Song_for_Serenity Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 97USA |
Hey there! This had a great flow. Wonderful poem. Keep it up! ~Angela |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
yeah! Can totally relate, been having a lot of weird dreams like that recently. |
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Ladybug Member
since 2003-06-17
Posts 236Massachusetts |
Very cool poem My only suggestion is that you change the last stanza to say "these dreams" instead of "this dream" to be consistent. Good poem, overall! Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end... [This message has been edited by Ladybug (07-06-2003 06:34 PM).] |
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