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Teen Poetry #6
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confusedwriter03
New Member
since 2003-06-29
Posts 9
U-S-A! haha

0 posted 2003-07-01 03:36 AM


Drama's revolving around my life today,
What is the right way?
It's always save a friendship
or how do I feel about him....
I can't make my own decisions anymore...
not with these situations that make me feel something ive never felt before,
so worried about people
no time to worry for myself
i like it better this way
cause now there's nothing i have to say.
DOES THIS POEM MAKE ANY SENSE? LIKE DO YOU UNDERSTAND A LITTLE WHATS HAPPENING CAUSE I KNOW WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT BUT THIS ISNT A DETAILED POEM SO PLEASE LET ME KNOW...OH AND I STILL NEED TO WORK ON THAT SYLLABLE THING I KNOW! LOL LATER.


            ~*~Krista~*~
~*~Im always confused about life~*~

© Copyright 2003 Krista K. - All Rights Reserved
eor
Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959
blues & greys
1 posted 2003-07-01 04:06 PM


hi and welcome...this i do know, all poetry makes sense in it can relate it to your life...not everyone will get the same meaning from the same words...but it they can understand it in any way then you have succeeded...on that note i did enjoy your poem, it has raw emotion inside of it...keep it up look forward to see more of you...
blueyedlioness
Member
since 2003-04-24
Posts 289
USA
2 posted 2003-07-01 07:03 PM


'Course it makes sense, girl. I think all of us have felt that at one time or another.

The meter was actually considerably better on that one... I can see you improving on it... keep it up!

Oh yes, and this particular line:

"so worried about people
no time to worry for myself"

doesn't match the rest of the rhyme scheme. Which throws the whole thing off a bit. I DO like the thought there, but if it doesn't fit properly, it takes away from the poem.

However, the poem as a whole, as an expression... was well done.

-Lioness

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