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Passions in Poetry

Painful Secret (please,please read)

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WinterWren
Senior Member
since 12-01-2002
Posts 1044
...Coming to


0 posted 06-06-2003 10:03 PM       View Profile for WinterWren   Email WinterWren   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit WinterWren's Home Page   View IP for WinterWren

I think this one is somewhat different from all my other's, but it's pretty self-explanatory why. Im not sure if I like it yet or not, but at least I got it out.

The cry in my heart is so loud
why can no one hear it?

Other's complain of their problems
cry about life's setbacks
I sit and listen quietly
I don't tell them why their problems are so petty
my pain cannot be shared.

So you have to wait for something a month or two,
people die everyday
can you hear the cries of those who loved them?
have you ever been close to someone, who tomorrow, might be taken away?
you cannot see how deep my river of suffering goes.

I have to bear this worry alone
I can only cry my tears when no one is looking
when all I want to do is scream at the world
that something so giving and beautiful,
may be dying.
Where will the light come from then?

So tell me about your problems,
I will listen.
tell me about what you want and why you want it now,
I will nod my head.
Cry,
I will offer you my shoulder,

I won't tell you that soon the world may be taken from under my feet
that I will have to continue on through the ashes
wailing and crying an ocean of burning tears,
but only when no one is looking.

WinterWren
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

© Copyright 2003 Stephanie White - All Rights Reserved
devinechild22
Senior Member
since 08-28-2002
Posts 576


1 posted 06-06-2003 11:05 PM       View Profile for devinechild22   Email devinechild22   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for devinechild22

This was an amazing write!

"I won't tell you that soon the world may be taken from under my feet
that I will have to continue on through the ashes
wailing and crying an ocean of burning tears,
but only when no one is looking."  
That is by far my favorite stanza. Please keep up the great work. I always enjoy your writes. Hope all is well.
           *Allison*

LegalSecret69
Member
since 06-04-2003
Posts 69
Virginia


2 posted 06-07-2003 08:13 AM       View Profile for LegalSecret69   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LegalSecret69

Excellent work, this poem, I have to agree, was amazing..  "Secret"
ESP
Member Elite
since 01-25-2000
Posts 2574
Floating gently on a cloud....


3 posted 06-07-2003 08:24 AM       View Profile for ESP   Email ESP   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ESP

Yes, brilliant!! Charged with emotion, beautifully expressed Wonderful write!
Luv, Liz xxx

"Gorge the honey from life, and live through the stomach aches knowing they will pass..." ~Liz Pinard 2003~

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 01-18-2000
Posts 24152
with you


4 posted 06-07-2003 11:37 AM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

this is how i felt, (or close to it) when my Aunt passed away... it still hurts, I still haven't cried all the tears I have to cry, and damn...I miss her every day. So my point is, I feel your ache, and hope you are ok
SarBear
Member
since 06-05-2003
Posts 215
Massachusetts


5 posted 06-07-2003 12:18 PM       View Profile for SarBear   Email SarBear   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SarBear

I love it.
My grandmother,she passed away last night of cancer.  I am going through the hardest time of my life at the moment.  I watched her go from a healthy person to a weak person that couldnt even walk-i knew that at any second of any minute of any day she could die and it was so hard for me.  The worst part is the story leading up to it.  I think you should read my poem that is in Open Poetry number 26 its called Regrets. Read and make a comment. And hang in there ok?  Its hard to let go.
Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 12-27-2000
Posts 5766
Riding


6 posted 06-07-2003 03:45 PM       View Profile for Skyfire   Email Skyfire   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Skyfire

Oh honey... this struck more than one chord in me, I don't know what to say about it. It's beautiful, emotional, and raw. The combination of the words you chose to express this left me speechless. i'm adding this one to my library, no doubt about that



email me if you need to talk, ok? I'm always always willing to listen to someone who needs to be heard
again
Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 07-18-2002
Posts 1122
in the pouring rain


7 posted 06-07-2003 04:20 PM       View Profile for Riley   Email Riley   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Riley

this was great, but the only thing that bothered me was the please,please read pasted in title line. otherwise, this was awesome...

riley

*the bloody tide comes in on the shore, time after time*

WinterWren
Senior Member
since 12-01-2002
Posts 1044
...Coming to


8 posted 06-07-2003 06:47 PM       View Profile for WinterWren   Email WinterWren   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WinterWren's Home Page   View IP for WinterWren

Thank you all so much for your warm replies.
They mean so much.
Riley, sorry if that bothered you but this poem is very important to me and I haven't been getting many replies on my other works of late.

WinterWren
Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

WindSong
Member
since 12-23-2002
Posts 316
Long Island, New York


9 posted 06-11-2003 09:11 PM       View Profile for WindSong   Email WindSong   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for WindSong

Wow. This is very powerful. I know how you feel when you said "have you ever been close to someone, who tomorrow, might be taken away?" I know. That's why I can't have long lasting relationships, I get scared that they will be taken away from me. It happens to me all the time, the closer I get to someone, and the more I start caring, something happens and they are POOF! Gone. I so know how you feel, girl. I'm here if ya ever need to talk. I'll listen. Even when you think I'm not, I am. I really liked this one, though. It sounds like me almost 100%. It just takes strength. Strength in numbers. I'm gonna put this piece into my library. It desrves it. Thanks for sharing, Steph. Pe@ce.

"Life is not measured by the moments we take,but by the moments that take our breaths away." -Author Unkown.

peachesNcream
Senior Member
since 08-21-2001
Posts 521
Ocean Of Tears


10 posted 06-11-2003 10:31 PM       View Profile for peachesNcream   Email peachesNcream   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for peachesNcream

Right now I am practically speechless. I can't believe how great this poem was...! Honestly, I think was one of the best poems I've ever read. For some reason this poem just struck my emotions very strongly. Thank you for the read and this is going into my library! ~Jess

"If a thing is worth doing at all, it is worth doing badly." -Gustav Holst

JenniX
Junior Member
since 06-05-2003
Posts 29


11 posted 06-12-2003 11:00 AM       View Profile for JenniX   Email JenniX   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JenniX

Awsome poem I luv your write. Hope ur okay. I know exactly how you feels. Listen to others but locking your secrets away burns holes in u. Kepp up the good work
Jenni
devinechild22
Senior Member
since 08-28-2002
Posts 576


12 posted 06-12-2003 05:24 PM       View Profile for devinechild22   Email devinechild22   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for devinechild22

I know what you mean about the "please please read." A lot of the old members left so I have gotten basically NO feedback whatsoever on my poems..Thats why I`m here so it is kind of upsetting.
                *Allison*
monkey
Junior Member
since 09-16-2003
Posts 27


13 posted 11-13-2003 02:49 PM       View Profile for monkey   Email monkey   Edit/Delete Message     View IP for monkey

awww. or actually yo dogg! i really REALLY liked this one...when you said have you ever been close to someone who tomorrow might be taken away...kinda reminds me of the situation with matt...one day everythings perfect and the next seems like everythings gone. awesome poem, going to read more!
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