navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Fall
Teen Poetry #6
Post A Reply Post New Topic Fall Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
lingering thoughts
Member
since 2003-05-03
Posts 70
Illinois, USA

0 posted 2003-06-02 11:05 PM





Are second chances crazy
am i losing my mind ?
Maybe
should I find a way out
before we scream and shout
that way noone will get hurt
by the insanity of it all
losing my way around
im not sure how to stand my ground
im used to giving it all
but maybe this way i wont fall...

should i dive right in?
or test the water out
I thought it was safe
but no longer can i doubt
the only way to learn is to make mistakes
so why do i not know what to do
with this little heartbreak
im used to giving it all
but maybe this way i wont fall...

tell me what to do
this way i can blame it on you
searching for a way to change
the little things you rearrange
so should i listen to my instinct
and not go with the flow
instead of giving it all
i should hold on before i fall...

hey everyone! i took forever revising this one trying to make it somewhat better ...haha, i thought i would try to rhyme this time *look i just did*LOL so please respond and tell me your thoughts
thanks a lot! *Cassandra


© Copyright 2003 Cassandra - All Rights Reserved
blueyedlioness
Member
since 2003-04-24
Posts 289
USA
1 posted 2003-06-07 12:07 PM


Well! I have to say that the revising and editing payed off... this is probably the best of yours I've read.

I hate you have to know how that feels... I'm kind of at that same place right now.

Hope things start goin' better for you...

Keep on writin'!

-Lioness

Kaydo
Junior Member
since 2003-06-02
Posts 17
Washington, USA
2 posted 2003-06-11 04:42 AM


wow!  I like how it all flows nicly together.

I thought that it was a wonderful poem and I hope to read more like this form you.

Great Job!!!    

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #6 » Fall

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary