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Teen Poetry #6
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Obsolete
Junior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 43


0 posted 2003-07-07 03:09 PM



I have arrived,
In this new white palace
(I have no chains)
Last night,
I slept here
Enjoying the crisp sheets,
Loving the cool air
While I struggle to remain,
It's comforting to know...
Whatever happens,
I did it without you.

© Copyright 2003 Obsolete - All Rights Reserved
Song_for_Serenity
Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 97
USA
1 posted 2003-07-07 03:30 PM


This was interesting. Short, sweet, to the point. Great write. Keep up the good work. Have a spiffy day!

~Angela
"Anything less than mad, passionate love is wasting your time...Life has too many mediocre things in it, love shouldn't be one of them..."

Savage Quiescence
Member
since 2002-07-29
Posts 326
Wandering
2 posted 2003-07-07 09:10 PM


I love the mood. It has attitude without being harsh. Good write
~Sky

"Whatever life brings, I've been through everything, but now I'm on my knees again" -Creed

Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
3 posted 2003-07-08 12:02 PM


ooo...refreshingly well done.
I loved this.
~Lex

Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
4 posted 2003-07-08 01:13 AM


Booyah!! (the "I did it without you" part... actually the entire thing )

Skyfire owns you - Stinky Twinky

dertah
Senior Member
since 2003-06-18
Posts 584

5 posted 2003-07-08 12:16 PM


haha, i laugh like french man, and say nice work.  and original too.
BrokenDreams
Member
since 2003-02-09
Posts 425
In The Clouds
6 posted 2003-07-08 12:40 PM


I'm glad you had the courage and power to break free of whatever was holding you back. Dang, that was wordy. LoL. Nice write.

-Jen

I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not. -Kurt Cobain

Obsolete
Junior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 43

7 posted 2003-07-08 01:41 PM


Many thanks.
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