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Teen Poetry #6
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Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

0 posted 2003-02-09 09:00 PM



Lay your crimson hands
on my back
pull me close
blood drips down
your fingertips dig into
flesh
eyes roll back in their sockets
head lolls against my shoulder blades
i've been here before
there's a puddle of self-pity at my feet
so beautiful and painful
the realization:
         killed by a pathetic dream
                   swallowing the tears of absolution
how the silence burns away the solitude
the beads lay scatter in a limp palm

               The PERFECT crime has taken place
the beauty
the pain
it is the aviator of desertion
what is a thing like this to be called
      DeAtH
not one life more, not one life less
the winter of disgrace
the wind howls upon my anger
the snow has fallen on my naked back
skin black and shriveled
how wonderful life is when all is dead
         the fox has died in the blaze
BURNT to a CRISP
don't come and save me
It isn't what i want from you
that hole in the wall
          ThE dOoR
don't let slam you in the rear
it's all in a parade of self-pitiful
crys
I've fallen dead, with the bottle
in my hand
and this time
         there was no need
to DISGUISE the
                 MEANING


Regina L.2003

"heaven truley knows that thou art false as hell...one that loved not wisely,but too well..she swore..'twas a strange ,'twas passing strange"-othello

© Copyright 2003 Regina Levy - All Rights Reserved
Skyfire
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Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
1 posted 2003-02-09 09:21 PM


Wow I will definitely be back to this one, when my mind isnt' in a rational mode
knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
2 posted 2003-02-14 05:56 PM


This one didn't seem as powerful as what I'm used to seeing from you. Though it still had a strong sense of what usually lies withing your writtings. One thing I didn't like is the on and off Caps in some of the words. But that's just because it generaly bugs me and not because of the poem itself. I didn't quite understand this one as well as I have your others, but its still written well and strong. I loved this bit:
quote:
not one life more, not one life less
the winter of disgrace
the wind howls upon my anger
the snow has fallen on my naked back
skin black and shriveled
how wonderful life is when all is dead
I'm going to come back to this later and see if I can pick up more from it. ^^ Good write Regina.

“A single choice can build destinies, or destroy them.”
"You can't fight the tears that aren't coming.."

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