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Teen Poetry #6
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BrokenAngel
Member
since 2002-01-06
Posts 141
Puryear, TN, USA

0 posted 2002-12-18 11:26 AM


Just Like Every One Else

I don’t want you to figure me out
You keep trying
But I wont let you

I’m to afraid to

If you figure me out
You unlock my dark secret
You might go away

Just like every one else

I don’t want to love you
Part of me tries to
But I wont let myself

I’m to afraid to

If I fall in love with you
I give myself to you
You might go away

Just like every one else

I wont show my pain
I wont let you see my tears
I can’t

I’m to afraid to

If my pain shows
If my tears fall
You might go away

Just like every one else
By: Night Angel


Read my work and read my thoughts
I'll go back into the night now
---Night Angel

[This message has been edited by BrokenAngel (12-18-2002 06:28 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Hannah Rochelle Garner - All Rights Reserved
Darkness
Member
since 2002-10-17
Posts 202
The place just beyond my eyes, where my spirit flies.
1 posted 2002-12-18 01:40 PM


Thats sad but good. I liked this peice and how it repeated the lines

"I'm to afraid to" and
"Just like every one else"

That gave the poem a little spunk and substance not to mention structure.

Keep writing,
Darkness

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
2 posted 2002-12-21 05:24 AM



Hannah~
Ouch...this is such a sad write.
Lots of emotion in this piece
and you've expressed it well.
I felt this one.
Very nicely done.
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

[This message has been edited by vlraynes (12-21-2002 05:25 AM).]

Heavens Tears
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677

3 posted 2002-12-21 12:09 PM


BrokenAngel,
I thoroughly enjoyed this piece.  I can relate to not wanting other people to see the real you.  But if this person is at all worth it, he'll love you for all that you are.  And if he can't accept it, then forget him, he's a loser anyway.   Easier said than done, I know, but its the truth.  Anywho, thanks for the great read.

[This message has been edited by Heavens Tears (12-21-2002 12:10 PM).]

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