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Teen Poetry #6
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CloudedDreams
Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 210
My Fantasy Realm

0 posted 2002-12-14 08:47 PM



Finally
The world can see
How great you can truly be
For success you hold the key
And you never cease to amaze me

So how does it feel
To have everything come through?
You have so much pride
In doing what you do
It has been rough
But it seems always that you
Can never lose a battle
Before your dreams come true

(chorus)

I hope that you get
All that you deserve
‘Cause achieving your passions
Is a prize well earned
But there is still much
That is needed to be learned
Never stop pushing hard
Don’t come so far to be burned

(chorus)

(bridge)
I always knew from years ago
That something grand burned in your soul
Now that thought has become real
So tell me, now how does it feel

to....

Finally
Have the world see
How great you can truly be
Ultimately finding success’ key
And never ceasing to amaze me

yeah-h-h-h

(chorus)

Yes there will be tommorrow, but will you be there to greet it?

© Copyright 2002 Eliza K. - All Rights Reserved
CloudedDreams
Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 210
My Fantasy Realm
1 posted 2002-12-14 09:02 PM


Sorry, guys, I forgot to poin out the chorus... It is the first 5 lines ....Sorry!
dinky
Member
since 2002-10-19
Posts 258

2 posted 2002-12-14 10:44 PM


hey,
this was really neat
i didnt know the beat to it
but it was still good!
~samantha~

"sometimes i just feel like
quittin i still might
why do i put up this fight?
why do i still write?"

quietlydying
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz
3 posted 2002-12-15 12:49 PM


i'm really glad to see the members in teen experimenting with different forms of writing.  i applaud you.  keep exploring, there's a whole world out there besides just poetry [though i do love it so].

this was a good write, and i'm really glad you shared.

keep posting.

/jen/


'i don't care if it hurts, i want to have control.  i want a perfect body, i want a perfect soul.'  [radiohead]

[This message has been edited by quietlydying (12-15-2002 12:50 AM).]

rOxXbabY391
Member
since 2002-12-14
Posts 71

4 posted 2002-12-15 04:53 PM


WoW! this is SOOO good! i reallly liked reading it, i wish i knew the beat!!

"I hope that you get
All that you deserve
‘Cause achieving your passions
Is a prize well earned"

you rhyme your lines really well

~*~eMiLy~*~

NSnaomian
Member
since 2002-07-22
Posts 232
In my troll closet I be
5 posted 2002-12-15 05:21 PM


I like this a lot. I love how I thought of so many people in my life when I read through this. It would make a great song!
Keep it up.
Laura

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