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Teen Poetry #6
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SlowDrag
Member
since 2002-01-10
Posts 53
Tx...need i say more

0 posted 2002-11-07 01:58 PM




In this life
there's so much pain
watch the light
chase the rain

feel the rain
washing away your soul
it's still not the same
god only knows...

I've changed my mind
i dont want to be me
changed my life...
what's beyond what i see?

i chase the rain
it washes away my soul
something's not the same
forget all i know...

chase the rain
chase the rain
chase the rain
chase the rain...

You don’t know
What I know
Or maybe what I knew.
But now all I can think about
Is a song I want to sing to you…

Chase the rain
You’ll find something brand new
Chase the rain…
And make your dreams come to you

chase it away
On to some other day
The sky is brand new…
It’s waiting for you…….

© Copyright 2002 Eric - All Rights Reserved
aries_luv_ppl
Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448
Universal Mind
1 posted 2002-11-07 02:24 PM


this is refreshing and inspiring thanks for sharing

Eliza Simmons
~Sometimes when I look back at what I wrote, I don't recognize the 'Me' in the past anymore.

dinky
Member
since 2002-10-19
Posts 258

2 posted 2002-11-07 02:54 PM


hey,
i luved this it was really good
i really like poems that rhyme too
do u think i could possibly put this in my private library??
cant wait to read more from you
~sam~

knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
3 posted 2002-11-07 02:58 PM


this was a pretty good write. i liked the usage of 'chase the rain' you used, keeping it even and not going over board with it. It read almost as a song to me, and i liked the flow it had.
quote:
Chase the rain
You’ll find something brand new
Chase the rain…
And make your dreams come to you

fav stanza ^^

“A single choice can build destinies, or destroy them.”

Getting away, isn't Running away.

"The hurt that you try to hide, is killing me."

NSnaomian
Member
since 2002-07-22
Posts 232
In my troll closet I be
4 posted 2002-11-07 07:23 PM


Oooo! I enjoyed this one. It put a song in my mind. I really liked your closing  stanza..."chase it away
       On to some other day
       The sky is brand new…
       It’s waiting for you"
I really liked that. Great job with this one.

Laura

"I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful."
-Bob Hope-

Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
5 posted 2002-11-08 01:10 PM


Very simple, but that adds to the overall serenity of the piece.  Kind of calm and soothing.  Put me in a good mood, by the way.  

Thanks for sharing this.

Parasite

Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
~Aldous Huxley

foreverwithyou
Member
since 2002-10-20
Posts 204
Wonderland
6 posted 2002-11-08 01:22 PM


i agree it was soothing and had a nice flow good one

"I am who I am who I am who am I?"

PoeticGoddessOfDepression
Member
since 2002-07-02
Posts 439
I am everywhere
7 posted 2002-11-08 10:13 PM


Aw.. I really liked this.
I don't really know what to say though.. it was kinda like a lullaby... now i want to sleep, but i have to write about how wonderful this was..
I liked the way it started off, kinda dreary... like a rain storm- and then it gets kinda happy, and hopeful. So then you always miss the rain while it's gone. (if that makes since to you)
a great ending to a day- chase the rain.


keep it coming.

[This message has been edited by PoeticGoddessOfDepression (11-08-2002 10:15 PM).]

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