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Teen Poetry #6
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Darkness
Member
since 2002-10-17
Posts 202
The place just beyond my eyes, where my spirit flies.

0 posted 2002-11-03 10:20 PM


Guilt and lies,
Corrupt the lives,
Of many children out there,
Who have nothing, no one,
Nobody to cling to,
When the loves all gone,
Nobody to be there,
When the nights grow cold and long,

Shivering through out the night,
Dreaming of the light,
To help them find the way out,
Of hell and of purgatory,
No rope to hang from,
When the road of joy ends,
No needle and thread,
From all the wounds to mend,

Orphans of abortion,
People of distortion,
Crying out feeling rotting,
And the cold grip of winter,
There's no blenket,
To save them from the cold,
No more medication,
To keep them from growing old,

These kids are only ten,
Oh why? Oh where? Oh when?
Did they get lost along the way,
Feeling numbness, nada, nothing at all,
People see them in the street,
Kicking dirt in their face,
People laughing in the street,
Holding them down in their place,

Orpans of the land,
Crawl up and out of the sand,
Feel what acceptance is,
The new breed is here...
It was just a trick from them,
We're still not right,
But it doesnt matter,
We're still gonna fight.

[This message has been edited by Darkness (11-03-2002 10:22 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Sam Prond - All Rights Reserved
Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
1 posted 2002-11-04 02:15 PM


This is very nice, Darkness.  Very well... dark... lol.

I love the title and the poem didn't disappoint it... this is the kind of poetry I'd like to see more of from you.  Just remember that dark poetry isn't all about content... in fact, it is mostly about the air you create around the poem.  Pay more attention to tone and sound in creating a dark piece.

Nice work.

Parasite

SailorFirebird
Junior Member
since 2002-10-21
Posts 16
15 Miles North of NoWhere
2 posted 2002-11-04 02:35 PM


omg, sam.  this is awesome.  i absolutely love it.  is fabbity-fab-fab.  love it. truely do.

I am Sailor Firebird! Defender of...ummm, STUFF! Behold my clarinet, vito, and the wrath of a squeeky reed!

Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
3 posted 2002-11-04 05:29 PM


this was truly an rad piece. "orphans of abortion" i love the title
there was a wicked flow to it.

regina

Darkness
Member
since 2002-10-17
Posts 202
The place just beyond my eyes, where my spirit flies.
4 posted 2002-11-04 10:05 PM


Gracias todos los personas.
I wrote that one a long long time ago.
Its good to see that my old stuff is just as good if not better then the new stuff.

Thanks again,

Darkness

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