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Teen Poetry #6

Indulgances

LCBS
Senior Member

since 2001-11-29

Posts 532
Connecticut

0 posted 2002-11-03 05:54 PM

Mazes of doubt are igniting my mind
and slowly burning bible verses in my head…
Temptation, it calls to me, begging me to leave it behind.
His shackles of living were broken when dead

I see clearly now through the links in my chain
The only way out is behind the cross, between the lines
God’s tears can flow down with his blood, with the rain
Scour my sins to make clearer the signs

Even he wore his crown of thorns with pride.
Why shouldn’t these scars be worn on my cuff?
I’ve carried my crosses in tears that I’ve cried,
I’ve nailed myself down but it’s never enough.

I see clearly now through the links in my chain
The only way out is through slits in his palms
God’s love can pour out with my soul, with the pain
I only find comfort deceiving his psalms

NSnaomian
Member

since 2002-07-22

Posts 232
In my troll closet I be

1 posted 2002-11-03 06:17 PM

Wow, deeply spiritual. This is great. How you found the words to say all that is amazing. Great job!

Laura

Real friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself, don't feel you've done a permanent job.

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

2 posted 2002-11-04 01:24 PM

Don't be such a meter tease, Lisa. If you start off in anapests, stick to the anapests...

Really liked this quite a bit. "tears I have cried" is kind of common, but otherwise, everything in here was very well composed.

Very nice work.

Parasite

Learn to place poetry before people
Before you place your poetry before the people.
~Andrey Kneller

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